Previously: Sharon got tired of being with the women, and was happy to get to rock 'n' roll with Bret Michaels. Unfortunately, they lost, but they made a whole bunch of money, so Trump decided not to fire anyone at all. Now: They all drink champagne together and are, for the first time in the history of this show, happy. They all toast Holly, who's really happy and crying about what this can do for the HollyRod Foundation. Sharon's glad that Holly got the money, but is pretty pissed that she didn't after raising all that money. "Money, money, money" credits. Curtis sure has a big knife. Afterward, Holly meets with her husband, who she says is a sight for sore eyes. She fills him in on the money she won for the charity: $347,000. He interviews that he knew she'd win some money for HollyRod, but he never thought she'd win this much. Then he surprises her, too, by bringing their four kids in to hug her and roll around on the floor with her. She says it was one of the best days of her life.
But we don't have much time to feel good, because it's time for the teams to meet Trump, in the ballroom of Trump SoHo. He says two executives, with Clockwork Home Services, are with him. They're basically a plumbing, heating and cooling, and electrician company. The task is to build three radio commercials, one for each brand (Benjamin Franklin plumbing, One Hour air conditioning and heating, and Mr. Sparky electricians). They'll be judged on brand integration, originality, and performance. RockSolid picks Bret as project manager. Bret says it will be tough, since being on time isn't his specialty, but he'll prove he can do it today. Summer's the PM for Tenacity, though she says she has no experience with recording studios, but she has a great support system. The winning project manager will get $20,000 from the show and an additional $20,000 from Clockwork. Trump promises them that one, or even two, people will be fired after this boardroom. Donald's third child, Eric Trump, a Georgetown graduate, is here for the first time. He and Ivanka will be Trump's eyes and ears. Seriously, how many kids does Trump have? Okay, I looked it up: Five. [If this show is still on when Barron is old enough to judge, we're all in trouble. -- Angel]
RockSolid van. Bret thinks they have to have fun and give each radio spot its own twist. Sharon thinks they work well as a team, because they're all rock 'n' roll. Bret starts about rapping about plumbing. They start making dirty jokes about plumbing and heating and cooling. Stuff like, "Can I suck your plunger, Mr. Franklin?" Bret interviews later that they were "completely perving out." He says that Sharon sometimes says stuff that is completely out there, and he thought he'd heard it all. They all just laugh and laugh about farting and pooping jokes.
Tenacity is much more serious about the task. Holly is, as usual, sort of controlling the show. Summer assigns Cyndi the lyrics and music. Holly whispers to Summer to charge Cyndi with one specific task and then explains that Cyndi's creative, so it's all about how Summer manages her.
RockSolid arrives for their meeting with the Clockwork people. Bret quickly realizes they're right across the lobby from the "enemy," so Bret takes all of the RockSolid posters into their room and turns the other team's around so they can't see their slogans. The executives are standing there watching, and Bret's all, "How you doing, guys?" They look serious, but laugh after he leaves the room. See? Everyone loves Bret.
Tenacity's executive meeting is first, and they ask about humor. They wouldn't want to see humor at the expense of the plumbers. Summer says they learned they weren't going to push the envelope so they ask "Why Ben Franklin?" And they tell a story about Benjamin Franklin and his bathtub, which sets Cyndi off talking about how Ben Franklin took a lot of baths with women in France. She saw it in John Adams on HBO. Curtis interviews that this is his first time working with Cyndi, and her energy has to be harnessed. They finish their meeting, and Summer and Holly think it's going to be crazy for the executives to deal with RockSolid, because this task is all about not going to far outside of the box.
Speaking of, Bret and Sharon are fake-tooting when the executives come in. Bret gets very serious quickly, though, and asks what kind of feel they're looking for. The executives want people to think of "plumbing" and "Ben Franklin" together; same with Mr. Sparky and electricians; and One Hour and air conditioning. Maria asks how humor does in their ads, and they say it's difficult to pull off, although it's great when someone hits it. Bret says they don't want to make it offensive humor. The executives say humors have been the "butt" of jokes and Bret laughs, but everyone else... crickets. They explain how being on time is so important to them that they pay people back for every minute they're late. Bret says he can imagine a homeowner giving them the wrong address to get free service. Sharon laughs, but the executives don't. Sharon tells us later that the execs were very corporate, and she wanted to say, "Lighten up, boys!" But she didn't. When the executives leave, Sharon says they're going to fire all three of them tomorrow. Bret says they just need to laugh it off.
Tenacity is focused on storyboarding the creative. Cyndi's working on the Ben Franklin ad, Holly has a commercial, and Curtis has a commercial. Summer plans on making the final approval on each of them. Cyndi starts rambling about Thomas Jefferson having a conversation with Ben Franklin about going to Paris with a bathtub or something. Summer interrupts her and tells her she wants her to be creative, but also listen to everyone else. She says this is how Cyndi can avoid having Summer throw her und the bus. In other words? The bus-throwing was totally Cyndi's fault. Cyndi asks what her task was, then. And she tells us that she's tired of these women, who don't listen to her. Cyndi leaves the room and Holly tells Summer she'll be a bitch by the end of it. They tell Curtis how it works with Cyndi, and he's all "Yeah," but then interviews that Tenacity is different than RockSolid was. He calls Summer and Holly "disciplined" and "methodical," but then adds, "Come on, let's face it, they can be a little bit bitchy." That is totally Curtis's way of saying they're total bitches, but he's too nice to admit it without all the diplomacy.
RockSolid. There's a little debate about whether it's One Hour Heating & Air Condition or One Hour Air Conditioning & Heating, because they have given them materials with it printed each way. They decide on One Hour Heating & Air Conditioning, which is on more of their products (but the site's the other way, I might add) [Actually, their other site has it the way RockSolid went with. Clearly these people need a lesson in branding. -- Angel]. Sharon thinks it's a pain in the ass because it doesn't flow easily when you say it. They all work together to create this spot, which is how Bret wants it to work, but he admits in an interview it sort of slowed them down. Bret keeps coming up with jingles that are still a little too risqué in Sharon's book for those corporate suits. You've got to hand it to her: For being pretty crazy on her own, she knows her audience. They sing about not paying a dime if they're not on time.
Back at Tenacity, Curtis is singing his air conditioning jingle, too. It falls flat, and he tells Summer he's a little weak in the music department. Summer tells him that Holly and Cyndi can help him. He reads his words, and they are worried about it because he's Australian and doesn't know how to speak American. Holly and Summer think he's the weakest player, and they tell him they're going to change some of his words.
RockSolid has moved on to their spot: Benjamin Franklin. When Sharon says a woman calls and says her "pipes are blocked," Bret laughs. Bret really wants it to be a rap song or something, but Sharon's not liking it. He then starts to say something about "cracking" jokes at plumbers' expense, and Sharon and Maria both tell him they won't like it. But Bret thinks they'll love it. Maria says it's tough to decide what's too far, but Sharon says it's too far. Bret interviews that he's possessed some plumber's crack in his life and he knows how hurtful it is when people make fun of you, so he tries to never make fun of plumber's crack. "It's a serious matter." It's such a magical moment, because I honestly cannot tell if he's joking or dead serious. And, either way, it's hilarious. He tells the ladies he'll take the fall if they don't think this is funny.
Back at Tenacity, Cyndi's singing an awesome Ben Franklin jingle and Summer's like, "But can you make it faster?" But she says everything in the most condescending way. I would just start sabotaging that team if I were Cyndi. And I like to think that's what Curtis is doing: breaking up the bitches. Summer can tell that Cyndi's going to need help with the editorial part of her ad since she's focused on jingles, so she starts to write it. She's reading some boring stuff about a kids' birthday party, and it's forty seconds long. Cyndi thinks it's too much information, and Curtis thinks it's too rushed, but Summer wants to get in all of the information that the executives gave them. Curtis gets that you want to get lots of information in, but thinks you want it to sink in.
Back at RockSolid, Maria's singing about Mister Sparky, all, "You're afraid of the dark, I'll give you a spark." She was repeating every idea back with a tone, which is how she says she works. Bret stops her and says she needs to be more simplistic. He interviews that he feels like he's fallen into a bad musical. He doesn't want everything to be 1930s. So she keeps singing exactly he same way. Sharon interviews that Maria's waterproof. You tell her to shut up and she just keeps singing. Bret starts singing a faster song, and Maria takes the lyrics and sings it at her slow pace. Bret yells, but I don't think it was mean although the editors want us to think it was.
Tenacity's singing about Mister Sparky too. Curtis thinks their ads are really vanilla, and thinks they should be more daring. He suggests choosing a scenario that's more daring, or embarrassing. He suggests talking about a plumber going around and not just fixing the pipes. Holly suggests talking about how her husband always clogs the toilet. But they just don't think the executives will like any of this stuff. Cyndi chimes in that it's bland and not funny. Holly goes with straightforward, and Summer says that's how they're going to go. Cyndi says it's so boring on this team, and who wants to live like this. She says it's the Girls Wanna Have No Fun team, and then tells Curtis it's boring and he laughs and hugs her.
After the commercials, we're back with Tenacity again. They have a group of singers and musicians. Cyndi's directing them to be cool without going into the "makes-me-nauseous" world. Summer says that now that they're in creative, Cyndi will play an important role, and it was great to watch her in her element. She grabs a guitar and starts singing out a jingle. She interviews that she was horrified to be writing jingles about air conditioning, but admits it's really catchy. Curtis interviews that he really likes Cyndi and thinks she brings this great creativity and passion. And he loves watching her boss around the musicians and vocalists.
RockSolid is doing this whole "Ben. Ben Ben. Ben, Ben, Ben. Benjamin Franklin, the Punctual Plumber" thing. Ivanka arrives, and Bret asks her if she wants to sing. She does not. He tells her about the their ideas, and she asks if he's singing. He's not, but he's doing the voiceovers. They tell her about the "crack" joke, and Ivanka tells them it's definitely a risk since the executives told them not to do that. Bret promises not to emphasize the word "crack."
Tenacity. Eric shows up to check them out, and he gets to see the singers and band at work. He asks what they're doing on the creative side, and if it's something memorable, so they sing their jingles. He interviews they were doing a great job and sounded good, but he isn't sure it would separate himself from any other commercial you'd hear. He thinks it sounds generic. But he tells them it's "very interesting."
RockSolid. Bret's hungry and asks Maria to steal him a slice of pizza. Curtis sees her and follows her in and yells at her for stealing pizza. Bret goes out and talks to him and comes back and tells the ladies how mad Curtis is. Sharon thinks Curtis thinks he's too hot. She says God bless him, but she's got nothing to say to him. They talk about how there will be something about a pastry and a frying pan in his team's ad. Tenacity. Cyndi's singing the jingles, but she keeps messing up and it's obviously driving Summer crazy. Cyndi ends up asking one of their singers to do it, because her voice was killing her. Summer is annoyed because she knows Trump's going to ask why they didn't use Cyndi.
RockSolid wants to make the air conditioning commercial memorable. They use what sounds like '70s porn music and mixed it with an infomercial about being hot and sticky. Bret can't think of a better way to sell air conditioning, but the women are concerned it's going to sound like patchwork. But Bret says that they're doing it live.
Tenacity van. Cyndi's practicing her singing in the car, and it's annoying everyone. Holly can't figure out why she's warming up since she didn't think she was going to sing. Summer's worried Cyndi will mess it up and Holly has the nerve to tell Cyndi that it's important because it's a live performance. Cyndi's like, "Uh, yeah, have you met me? I have done live performances." Only less snotty. That was my own irritation working its way in.
RockSolid. Bret has his game face on, singing and snapping his fingers. And he once again says he's going to fall on the sword about the '70s porn heating and air conditioning. He tells her it that it at least has attitude, and this is him reeling himself in or he'd have been all over the place. Sharon agrees: "I'm gonna put my plunger up your pipes." Bret says he wants to go out big, and she tells him to do what his heart tells him.
Tenacity. They ask Cyndi which one she wants to do and have her go practice. While she's in the sound room, Summer and Holly whisper about how her voice isn't "mainstream" enough, and Holly says she's worried and maybe the professionals who do this every day should do it. Cyndi sings, and Holly and Summer hate it. Holly says it won't be the perfect vocal the other girl gave her, and she wouldn't have let Cyndi do it if she were project manager. Cyndi interviews that the sound of her voice would add character to the jingle. Summer says that they're working with professionals who have been practicing the part and should go with them. Cyndi says she knows the part. Curtis says it would be a waste not to use Cyndi, and then interviews later that you can't give up on Cyndi Lauper's voice and would be crazy not to use it. Summer tells Cyndi, "We'll see." God, they're like mean girls. I hate them so much.
The executives get seated for RockSolid's presentation. RockSolid's still practicing their very cool "Ben, Ben, Ben!" and "Mister Sparky," then they say they're ready and their sound people make sure everything's working, and they begin. Bret explains they're performing three spots for executives in another room, and "I feel like I'm in the movie Seabiscuit. You know what I mean?" Why, no, Bret, no one knows what you mean. He goes on to make sound effects and add, "Like we're making walking sounds while we're singing. It's so old-school, but it's also kind of fun." Still not sure what he means with the Seabiscuit thing, but it's charming, so who cares? Bret wishes them a good morning and introduces the spots. They start with Mister Sparky, which is quite good. up is One Hour Heating & Air Conditioning, which is not nearly so sexy and risqué as Sharon thought. She even tells Bret it was perfect after all. Last is Ben Franklin, which is probably their most catchy jingle. At the end, the executives say they like the originality and need to hire Bret as a salesperson, but they're disappointed in the humor and wish Bret had come back a step further with that.
Tenacity's presentation time. Summer's nervous because it's a live performance. Cyndi's still trying to tell Summer her voice has more character and she should do it. Ultimately, Summer says she decided it's Cyndi Lauper, and she's going to let her sing it. The editorial part is long and WAY too fast, but Cyndi singing the jingle is great. However, it's hard to even know what they're advertising. That's how bad their copy part was. I think it was One Hour Heating & Air Conditioning. up is Benjamin Franklin, which is also boring on the copy, and the song part isn't great either. Finally, Mister Sparky. It's a lot of copy again, and the executives seem to love it. They were all extremely generic, but I have a feeling the executives are going to choose these. Because they're boring. Summer's happy with the job they did. The executives discuss it, and they think it went a little too fast, but they realize thirty seconds is short. They liked their use of humor (which I must have missed). The executives head to talk to Trump, which all happens off-screen, which is fine by me. They never say anything anyway, other than to say they like both and then cut off right when they're about to say who they chose.
Boardroom. Trump first asks Eric if he's enjoyed this, and he claims he had a lot of fun. Trump asks Bret how he did, and Bret thinks they did very well, coming up with original ideas and getting it all done on time. Both Sharon and Maria thought Bret was a terrific project manager. Bret says he felt comfortable, since he likes being in the studio. He says they reeled him in a little bit, and they just spit out great ideas. Ivanka says it was an interesting dynamic to see Sharon reining in the rock star, which she's sure Sharon is used to, trying to make it a little more dry and on-point. Trump asks if it's true, and Sharon says Bret has a great imagination, but they don't always have the time.
Trump asks Summer what she thinks, and she loves her team and her team's end product because they listened to the executives and got back to them what they wanted. Trump asks who her weak link was, and she says she didn't have one, but she had Cyndi, who was her strong link. She also says Holly was amazing. Trump asks Curtis how they did, and he thinks they won. Trump asks if he thinks he did a good job, and he does. Silence. Then Cyndi pipes up that the executives were so straight and conservative. She tells the whole story about wondering what Ben Franklin, who's all about electricity, has to do with plumbing other than being in the tub with a lot of French women. Everyone's cracking up, even Ivanka. And Trump's even smiling a little. She says they wanted no funny stuff about the plumbers. Which is Trump's opportunity to segue back to RockSolid, who didn't pay attention to that advice. He asks why Bret used the plumber's crack joke. He says he didn't feel it was a joke, but Sharon and Maria told him not to do it so he'll own up to that one and be fired if they lose. Ivanka doesn't get that, since they explicitly asked them not to make jokes at the plumbers' expense. Bret says he wants something that stands out, and self-deprecation is a form of confidence.
Trump plays RockSolid's Ben commercial. Then their Mister Sparky commercial, which they liked the most. Cyndi's giggling along with both of them. The executives felt they could really put the Mister Sparky commercial on the air. Trump asks if Summer thought their commercials were better, and she didn't. Curtis felt they were a little off-brand, and that one had a catchy jingle and the other didn't. Sharon makes a face so Trump asks her to respond to that. She says she never likes his comments. Maria disagrees with him too. Trump asks Eric about Tenacity, and he says the executives thought they packed in too much information and lacked originality, but they really liked hearing Cyndi sing. They play the Cyndi commercial, and everyone looks bored until Cyndi sings. Trump agrees with the executives that they had too many words. He plays the one the executives liked, which is the one about plumbing. Everyone still looks bored. Eric says the executives liked the music and the brand message. Sharon thought they were professional. Maria thinks theirs was more musical and Bret thinks theirs was more original.
Trump thought both teams did a great job (what a shock!). The executives thought that one team was okay at best, and the other team was fantastic. He asks Summer what she wants him to say, and she says she'd like him to say that they won, but he can't do that, because RockSolid won. Bret's so happy he hits the table. Trump says they're going to use the Mister Sparky ads all over the place, and that Bret's charity, the American Diabetes Association gets $40,000. Before he leaves, Trump asks Bret who he'd fire. He looks over and says it's tough, but he might fire Summer because she's tough. He says he'd like to get rid of her. Sharon thinks Curtis. Trump asks if she doesn't like Curtis, and she says, "Not a lot." Curtis just laughs while Sharon says he's too smug and "Put another shrimp on the barbie." Sharon thinks Australians are usually like that. Trump is surprised by this, as is Curtis, who says they've never even worked on the same team. Maria agrees with Sharon and doesn't know why, but she wants to punch Curtis. In grade school, we called that a crush, Maria. He says he hasn't gotten to work with her, but they obviously formed strong opinions about him. Trump says he doesn't seem like that to him. RockSolid leaves, and group hugs in the hallway. Trump tells Tenacity someone will be fired. I vote Summer, especially since Curtis and Cyndi really tried to get her to be less boring and use fewer words.
RockSolid pours their champagne in the suite and settles in to watch. They're still singing their Mister Sparky jingle. Bret interviews that it's hard to be on this show, and he's so proud to still be here, raising money for diabetes. Trump asks Summer what she thinks, and she says she's disappointed because it sounded great. Trump interrupts and asks if she gets what the executives were saying, and she says she doesn't. Holly says that since the other team referred to a "crack" in any way, shape, or form, she's surprised they'd want to use any of those. Trump says the other team's commercials were great, and so clear. Eric asks Holly where she fit in, since Summer was directing and Cyndi was recording. He thought she seemed the most reserved and in the background. She says she did the entire Mister Sparky spot. Eric asks if it's safe to say that Cyndi carried the team. Holly thinks it's fair to say she was a huge part, and she was proud of her for working inside the box. Eric asks if she's the strongest person on the team, and Holly says she would say Summer for delegating.
Ivanka asks about the rationale of making everyone a micro-project manager responsible for the content of a whole commercial. Summer thought it was appropriate since they had four people. Ivanka says she delegated a lot in this task, which may have been strategic. She asks Summer which commercial was her least favorite. She liked the Cyndi one best, and then the other two equally. Trump points out they were in love with the other team. Summer blandly says, "Oh, wow." Man, she is all bland. She is practically mayonnaise. I would take Holly's fiery bitchiness over the boring bland following delegating bullshit of Summer any day. Trump says he doesn't have to feel guilty about firing someone here. Summer says she was very worried that they didn't know the brand or how conservative or edgy to be, so maybe they missed the boat on that.
Trump asks Cyndi what she thought of her performance, since the executives expected to hear more from her. She says she had no voice. Trump says they loved her voice, but wanted to hear more from her. He asks Curtis who he'd fire, and he says Summer. (DUH!) Trump tells Summer to tell him who should not be fired, and she says "um" a lot. She chooses Holly. Trump asks if she thinks she was outstanding, or if it was because of past performance. Summer says she was consistent. He sends them all out, and says the other three will be back in a moment. Holly wishes them farewell, and says she doesn't want to go with RockSolid. Maria thinks Curtis is going. Holly comes in and she seems to think it's Summer. Sharon thinks Curtis, and Bret says Curtis or Summer.
Eric tells Trump that Summer was a decent leader, but the responsibility falls on her. Ivanka says Curtis doesn't have the respect of the people who remain. Trump calls them back in. He smiles at Summer and says it's not a good position. She says she wanted the $40,000 for her charity and hates losing. Trump asks Curtis why the other team dislikes him, and he says he's a bit surprised and doesn't know why. He says he hasn't had much to do with Maria, but he and Sharon get along quite well other than a colonial running joke between the English and the Aussies. A joke he thought was all in fun until now. Trump tells Curtis he's disappointed in him for not fighting back. Curtis says he speaks respectfully to women and didn't think it was appropriate to scream at them. Trump asks Summer who he should fire, and she can't answer the question. He says she's going to have to or she's going to get fired. Summer says Cyndi worked hard, so if he weren't to fire her the only person to fire would be Curtis. Trump asks who he should fire: Curtis or Summer. He says he's not going to fire Cyndi unless she says something really stupid, "which is possible." Cyndi and Ivanka laugh. Trump actually decides to send Cyndi away before she can put her foot in her mouth.
Trump asks Curtis what he thought of Summer as the project manager. He says he has respect for her and thought she made some good decisions, but she had to decide whether to be edgier or not. Curtis says, in the most impossibly diplomatic way, that he suggested being edgier (he basically doesn't phrase it like he suggested it, but says he just brought it up to "give Summer the option"). Trump asks if that's true, and Summer acknowledges it. Trump says Curtis was probably right, but Curtis says he completely understands the position Summer was in. Trump asks Curtis if Summer hasn't been a very, very strong player and it would be a shame to fire her at this point. Curtis says she has been a strong player: She's won one challenge, and now has lost one. Ivanka asks Summer if she's more likely to beat the other team, or is Curtis. She thinks she's more likely to win going forward, and has been strong in the past. Curtis says to fire her, since she's the project manager and, at the end of the day, the decisions were hers.
Eric says Curtis wasn't very loud about wanting to make the commercial edgier, and he was very quiet when Eric visited. Curtis says the way he works is to not derail the project manager's agenda. He says he voiced his opinion with Summer, and she chose not to listen to it. He says he's won a challenge and was instrumental in winning the first one. Trump tells Summer he has been a strong player. Summer agrees he has been a strong player. She shakes her head, and Trump asks if she's having a hard time. He asks who he should fire, and she says Curtis, because she tasked people to do things. She says it was difficult for Curtis to be involved because the jingles were set by Cyndi and the creative by Holly and it was difficult for Curtis to get the Australian accent out of his jingle. Trump says that's not his fault, and she agrees that nothing is his fault. She's just saying Curtis because she wants to compete. Ivanka tells Summer that's not a good reason, and she needs to fight for it and throw Curtis under the bus by reminding Trump that she'd never been in the boardroom before. She tries to repeat Ivanka's points, but Trump says it's a little late for that, and he fires her. Eric thought it was a tough decision, and Trump thinks she's a great person but she was the project manager. Ivanka agrees, especially since she wasn't able to defend herself.
Taxicab confession: She says it sucks to be fired. She's super competitive, so she hates losing and then hearing the words "You're fired." She never wants to hear them again, though she realizes someone had to go. Man, she can't even fight for herself alone in the cab? That doesn't seem that competitive to me, I have to say. Shot of Bret from the opening credits as Trump voices over that this show is dedicated to him, with thoughts and prayers for a full recovery. Ditto. week: Trump puts Curtis with Sharon and Maria since he said that's why they didn't like him. The women moan and groan. The task is to furnish and paint an apartment. Sharon and Maria still seem to hate Curtis, who's doing wall-sits. Cyndi and Holly still hate each other, once again in the boardroom.
DeAnn, a writer and editor in Portland, Oregon, thinks there must be something wrong with a female who doesn't like Curtis. You can contact her at twopmodmars@gmail.com.
See who we really want to see on the season of this show.
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