The models packed their bags, y'all, and went to Bali! Having had last week's best photo, Nina gets to enjoy the Tyra Suite in their new amazing house. Pretty much everyone in the house seems to feel that Chris should have gone home last week, and was saved by Kelly Cutrone's inexplicable love and high scores.
The challenge for the week has the models sporting swimwear from the brand 69 Slam and walking on an underwater runway while wearing giant Seawalker helmets that make them look like the boy in the bubble but enable underwater breathing. We learn that Nina had part of her lung removed after inhaling an airborne fungus, and because her lung could actually implode underwater she is not able to fully do the challenge. She cries about this and is further upset that Chris abandons her in her moment of need. She does get to snorkel for the challenge, as does Don who bails on the underwater runway when he has a panic attack. The two of them along with Marvin get particularly low challenge scores, while Renee racks up another victory with her attitude-heavy under the sea walk. Speaking of Renee and Marvin, they're still cuddling and Marvin tells us that they provide "positive distractions" for each other. That sounds like…oral?
For this week's photo shoot, the models pose with one of a series of animals. Cory and Jourdan shoot with an orangutan, Nina and Don get a python, Renee and Jeremy have a baby leopard, and Chris and Marvin each get two macaws. While Nina is initially excited to have her Britney Spears python moment, when the thing starts slithering out of frame Johnny gets quite upset and says he doesn't think they got even one good photo. She cries and cries and Chris once again abandons her since he's sick of the tears. Despite the fact that Johnny told us that Nina's shoot was a disaster, she gets best photo for the second week in a row. The judges are overall quite mixed in their opinions this week, but Renee does fairly well as does Jeremy, despite Kelly's opinion that he looks like a Siegfried and Roy affiliate. Don and Marvin are not so lucky, and they land in the bottom two despite everyone's wishes that Chris will finally be eliminated. In the end, Marvin squeaks by to make out with Renee for another week and poor Don is sent home.
We begin the episode with the furor of packing for Bali! We're down to the final eight, and while Marvin is psyched for a trip out of the country, Don tells us that the stress of the competition is taking a toll on him. We are reminded that he has post-traumatic stress disorder from being attacked, and is trying to kick his mind into the right gear. He looks REALLY exhausted. Still super hot, though.
Nina then talks about last week's weird panel, with Chris landing in the final two with Alexandra, who was ill and laying on a cot backstage. What's even weirder is Chris himself. Nina says that the two of them are still close, but apparently the efforts at maintaining that closeness are one-sided. Big freaking surprise, eh? There's negative energy between them, and Nina's not getting any love back. Still, she was happy to see Chris stay. I think. Chris, of course, is only concerned with himself and how nervous he was at being in the bottom two. He has nothing to go home to, since his mom sent him packing at the age of 18. I mean, I'm sure he has some untaken medication to return to, at the very least.
Anyway, boys versus girls! It's five guys and three girls left, and Jourdan is surprised that Renee is doing so well. She names Renee as her biggest threat since the judges see something special in her. Also, despite Jourdan's claims at having the best walk in the house, Renee can stomp it out better than the rest of them. Renee is acutely feeling the rivalry too, telling us that she's not going to let Jourdan beat her again. While Jourdan might have dominated the first half of the competition, Renee is about it to take it home. At least she has a home to return to, skulks Chris somewhere in his brain.
And then we're in Bali! It's gorgeous, there are elephants and ocean, and Renee skips out of the airport saying "We're in Bali, bitches!" Renee was born in Trinidad and calls herself an island girl. She feels at home in the tropical humidity, and says she's ready to bloom and crush the competition. The contestants ride on a bus from the airport and exclaim at the gorgeous scenery. Jourdan tells the others not to make fun of her for never having been out of the country, which they are right to do after she's like, "Oh my God, a chicken!!!!" Cory interviews that Jourdan is very sheltered and hasn't seen a lot. He does an impression of her in L.A. going, "Oh my God I've never seen a black person before! I thought they only existed on TV!" which obviously is hyperbole, and hopefully extreme hyperbole.
The contestants arrive at a location with beautiful traditional legong dancers and gamelan musicians. Rob and Johnny welcome the models, saying this is just a small taste of the beauty and culture they'll experience in Bali. A larger taste comes in the form of their villas at the resort. Nina, having the best photo last week, gets the Balinese Tyra Suite and celebrates accordingly. Jourdan tells us the house is the most beautiful she's ever seen, and there's lots of jumping around. Marvin points out a lovely lounge area where he can see himself and Renee snuggling in the sunset. At this point he's scared to call himself her boyfriend (scared of what she'll do if she hears him saying that, I'm guessing) but tells us to give him a couple more days and it will be at that point. What he means, I think, is that he's planning to finally bone her in Bali. Renee confessionalizes that she doesn't fucking know what's going on with her and Marvin. But she likes the kid, who has a nice body and is hot.
Marvin seems to be walking down a rather unwise (for he who wants to get laid) "bros before hos" path, and talks with the other guys and Nina in the pool about how they think the final three will be two dudes and a lady. Chris also unwisely proclaims that it's he and Nina who will be in the final two, with one of either Marvin, Don or Cory. That's unwise because he says it directly to those guys, who come back at him with the fact that he was in the bottom two last week and only moved forward after an inexplicable score of 9 from Kelly that they think was undeserved. They all think he should have gone home, but Chris points out that Kelly is a PR MAVEN and thus know what she's talking about. The fact that they're so preoccupied with his score, says Chris, is a sign that they're threatened by him. Also a sign that they hate him. Cory agrees that Chris should have gone home, but was saved by the fact that Kelly Cutrone had her head up his ass. He adds for good measure that Chris is totally immature, not ready for the competition, and should go home. Chris probably wishes he could go back to those halcyon days when people merely found him incredibly annoying because he punched them in the nuts.
The models then get on a boat where Johnny introduces them to Carole Lacroix, brand manager of Bali-based swim and underwear line 69 Slam. Carole like models with a great physique and great attitude, and today the contestants will get to show that on a runway at the bottom of the sea. Is it too much to hope that a wayward shark will stumble across this and think of it as a buffet line? In addition to the 69 Slam swimsuits, the models will be wearing Seawalker helmets that will help them breathe underwater. Don starts freaking out at the thought of losing control and wearing a breathing helmet underwater and can't focus on anything but his own anxiety. He is not soothed by the prize for the challenge -- $3,000 worth of swimsuits and underwear.
We then see Nina ask Johnny how deep the underwater runway is, given her "lung situation." He's all, "…quoi?" and Nina explains that part of her lung was removed. She breathed-in some sort of airborne fungus and was really sick for eight months, thinking that she was having odd mood swings but really actually dying. If she goes too deep underwater, her lung could implode. Johnny had no idea about this, even though it seems like very important information that would be drawn out in an exploitative manner at casting. Marvin basically hopes that Nina's lung implodes just a little, because she's fierce competition and he'd like her out.
The runway is about twelve feet under the water's surface, and Jourdan is first to walk it. She tells us again that runway is her best asset in the competition, and she has the best walk. Johnny agrees that she had great energy and a great walk, and really embodied the brand. Renee is , and Johnny loves that she's giving full attitude like she's on a catwalk In Paris. So, the rivalry continues! We then cut to Nina, talking to executive producer Laura Fuest. The diving expert on site said that Nina's situation is potentially unsafe, and the producers…probably…don't want to have us watch a lovely girl's lung implode on camera. Nina starts crying, and Laura tells her that she's safe to snorkel. It's definitely a disadvantage, and Nina continues to shed tears on the boat deck. Chris and Cory are there, and Chris interviews that the crying thing is getting to him. There's nothing he can say to "better her" that he hasn't said already, so he just walks away in her time of need. Cory tries to calm her, saying that she'll be judged on how professionally she handles the situation, but what she really wants is Chris to comfort her. Instead, he cracks jokes with Jourdan. Nina tells us that Chris always calls her his girl, but she doesn't much feel like it now. And really, it's her fault for trying to get her savior complex on with this nut-punching clown in the first place.
It's Chris's turn on the runway, and he does a weird jump at the end that Johnny seems to like. Marvin looks pretty stiff, and Johnny reports that he's not feeling it. There's no energy or excitement. Poor Cory doesn't have a good body for bathing suits, and will probably land at the bottom on DNA alone. We cut to Marvin holding Renee against him. She is grossed out by the fact that she likes him, but thinks he's sweet and says that he makes her want to be sweet too. Jeremy is on the underwater catwalk, and Johnny is not impressed. He's not fun, there's no pep in his step, and he's doing weird girl poses. Then it's time for poor Don to get in the water. He tells us that when he's not in control his mind snaps back to his attack and he gets panicked. He puts on the helmet but can't get under the water before asking to take it off. He says he's got bad anxiety, and Marvin and Cory try to tell him that it's not that bad and he can breathe normally. He says he'll try again, but has a baseline level of fear that's really hard to deal with. He gets to the catwalk and freaks out when he sees how far away the water's surface is. Don asks to be taken back up, and Johnny can't believe that he's bailing. But Don tells us that on his way back to the air he's thinking, "Fuck this challenge, I just want to live."
Everyone pretty much feels terrible for Don, and tough he kind of wants to try it all again, the anxiety is killing him. Johnny calls Don over and says that they're considering his anxiety a medical issue, akin to Nina's collapsing lung. So he'll also get to go the lame snorkeling route. Nina knows that having to snorkel puts then at a severe disadvantage, even though she vows to be fierce with a snorkel mask. Johnny says that she has to work extra hard to make up for her lack of underwater catwalk points, and while Nina is flailing around gracelessly Carole says that she wouldn't book her. Don dons the snorkel mask , but his nerves are shot and he's pretty fatigued at this point. He can barely hold himself up, much less rock the bathing suit and get some interesting body shapes.
Johnny and Carole gather the models on the boat to give critiques. Marvin is such a personality, but didn't give any energy on the catwalk. Nina's photos weren't as strong as Johnny would have hoped, and because he couldn't snap out of the panic, Don's photos were also really flat. On the good side, Chris jumped and used the water to his advantage. Jourdan was very fluid, no pun intended, and let's be honest, she looks great in a swimsuit. Johnny loved Renee's performance, and particularly her on-point posing. And Renee is the challenge winner! Jourdan is peeved, and tells us again that she knows she has the best runway walk out of everybody there. She won't be able to show it off in her $3,000 worth of 69 Slam bathing suits, though! Renee tells us that it's time for the underdog to start barking and shut everybody else up. Thankfully, she doesn't actually go "ruff-ruff!" like a little puppy. She saves that for snuggle time with Marvin.
Back at the house, the challenge scores are posted. Renee has a 10, Jourdan has a 9, Chris has an 8 as does Jeremy, whose girl poses were I suppose all right in the end. Cory, Nina and Marvin all have 6s, and poor Don circles the drain with a 5. Don is bummed, but heartened by the fact that he's only one point behind several of his peers. He's hoping to kill it on the photo shoot. Nina stares in shock at her score, and tells us that she's not ready to go home and have her dream disappear. Well, then, try having a whole lung.
Meanwhile, Renee and Marvin snuggle in bed, with Jeremy right to them. That's got to be awkward, right? Marvin compliments Renee on her soft skin and lips and her…wet hair. You know, he's still working some things out. Jeremy comments on what a weird couple Renee and Marvin are, given her shyness -- some would call it sense of dignity! -- and Marvin's lack thereof. Marvin tells us that Renee is a distraction in a good way, and the two of them help to keep each other in the moment. Plus, nookie is a great de-stressor.
The models head to a place called Bali Safari for the week's photo shoot. And there are animals! Johnny greets the crew with an orangutan chilling to him and lets them know that they're going to be posing with some non-human friends. In addition to the orangutan, who seems quite lovely, there are macaws from South America, a Javan leopard, and an albino Burmese python. He tells them that their job is to channel their animal companion and get an amazing living photo.
Hair and makeup is like backstage at The Lion King. Cory is psyched that he gets to pose with an orangutan, given how similar they are to humans in terms of physique. The photographer for the day is Lennette Newell, who is a specialist in shooting animals. Cory and the awesome orangutan friend hang from a rope, and Cory tells us that he's embodying the orangutan but also giving high fashion and looking fierce. Jourdan also poses with the orangutan, in a wig that makes her look like Shelley Long. Renee is thrilled that Jourdan is struggling in her shot. The orangutan is killing it though.
Nina is , and is posing with a python wrapped around her neck. She's excited to have her Britney Spears moment, until the python starts acting up and going out of frame. Johnny yells at Nina to better manage the python, which is tough talk for someone who is not wrapped in a giant fucking python. He's worried about her, and in fact she seems to be struggling even more as the shoot goes on. As a friend Don is concerned for her, but as a competitor he's hoping that she biffs it good. At the end of Nina's shoot, Johnny says he's not confident that they got anything. Nina starts crying about how she could have done better, which gives Chris yet another opportunity to not offer her comfort. He tells us that Nina's tears are nothing new to him, and she needs to get over it. I sort of get his point, though, since everyone else tries to console her and she defies their comfort so she can continue to wallow in misery. Cory interviews, "Surprise, Nina is upset agaaaaaain." He's kind of sick of it, but also cares about Nina. Meanwhile, Nina is SO absorbed in her own pain that she sneaks a look out of the corner of her eye to see if Chris gives a rat. He does not. She wonders why she's bothering to give his whiny antics any of her attention when he won't reciprocate. Maybe these two DO deserve each other.
Don is with the python, and looks awfully nervous. The python keeps moving out of frame for him too, and Johnny keeps yelling at Don to lengthen his neck and keep his chin up. Johnny tells us that Don is a good looking guy, but there was no point at which he was wowed. Awwww, and then there's the baby leopard! Renee is posing with him, and is terrified. This is the girl who couldn't handle a toad, if you'll remember. She gets close to the leopard then runs away, and someone yells at her to remember that quick movements are bad. Renee wonders how, if she can't make quick movements, she's supposed to get away from the leopard's sharp fangs. She tells us that this is a wild animal. The leopard wants to play, but how leopards play (mauling humans) and how humans play (buying leopard coats) are not always compatible. Renee is quite edgy with the leopard, and Jourdan is thrilled that she's freaking out.
Jeremy also poses with the leopard, and seems uber-calm and also like the two of them might make sweet love. Johnny says that Jeremy came strong, and will get a good shot today. Chris is with the macaws on his shoulders. Johnny asks for more expression in his face, since he looks tired and bored. Then Chris tries to make a wing with his hand, which does not work at all. Johnny notes that Chris is really struggling, and he's worried about his chances at a good photo. Marvin is also posing with the macaws, and Johnny tells him to model through his tropical bird makeup rather than looking like a drag queen. He continues to have a hard time, and Johnny doesn't feel any connection between Marvin and the birds. Marvin is quite concerned about going home, where there is no Renee with which to cuddle.
Speaking of Renee, she gives Jeremy kudos for holding his shit together with the leopard, and Jeremy admits that he's feeling like he might have best photo. Marvin smirks, and tells us that Jeremy is a muscle head, and also not a very good model. Renee pipes in to say that she hopes Jeremy gets best photo, which annoys cuddle buddy Marvin. He says that she should want best photo for herself, which really means that he wants her to think that he should get best photo. Renee gets pissed, because finally she gives a compliment to someone and she has to deal with all this flak. From the dude she's sexing no less! Marvin then gets mean and reminds Renee that she's never had best photo. She tells us that he's a jackass, and she can do better than him. The two bicker back and forth, and I think she even calls him "girl." Marvin says that he loves Renee to death and loves her body, but her mouth is annoying. Cory doesn't know what to do with these children, other than remind them that they're on a job and should try to have a modicum of professional decorum. Maybe this is their dysfunctional foreplay?
And then it's panel time! There are prizes, there are judges, there is a scoring system. Renee is up first for evaluation, and she gets mixed reviews on her photo. Kelly says that there's a flatness to her modeling, and that she has an air of Jada Pinkett-Smith about her. Rob agrees, saying that she's flat but there's some connection with Renee and the animal. Tyra thinks that Renee looks stunning, but her body looks wide from hip to hip. You have to dip and then the hip, says Tyra, and I have watched that clip at least fifteen times and still have no idea what she's talking about. Bryanboy isn't proud of Renee's social media score. However, the judges still give her pretty good marks -- she gets a 7 from Rob and 8s from Tyra and Kelly.
Cory is , and Kelly loves his shot. She thinks he's a connected androgynous creature, but hates how he's currently dressed as a castaway. Rob thinks that Cory's photo looks comical rather than edgy and editorial. Well, he's posing to a Flixel-ized primate who's scratching himself. Tyra loves it, and says that Cory embodied the challenge. He gets a 6 from Rob and 9s from Kelly and Tyra. Then there's Don, who has to talk about his underwater panic attack. Rob likes Don's photo and his bas-ass face. Kelly agrees that the face is good, but says that his body looks like that of a slouchy neighbor chilling in his backyard. Tyra also concurs that Don's face is divine, but from the chin down he looks like a boxer with a really thick neck. It's not elegant. Don's social media score also drops. He gets a 6 from Tyra, 7 from Kelly and 9 from Rob.
Chris is up , and Kelly loves his show per usual, saying that he looks like king of the birds. Rob and Bryanboy band together to call Kelly out on her bewildering love for Chris, and call the shot boring. But Kelly loves everything about Chris as a model, and says that this is the first photo where you can see a relationship between the model and the animal. Bryanboy tells her that she needs to get her eyes checked. Rob says that there's no connection and it's absolutely flat, but Chris gets away with it because he has a model face. Tyra agrees with Rob, saying that the photo is Cirque de Soleil backstage. Fans aren't crazy about it either, according to Bryan. Chris gets a 9 from Kelly and 6s from Rob and Tyra.
Then there's Nina. Counter to Johnny's assertion that they didn't get anything, Kelly calls the shot stunning and says that Nina looks like the love child of Audrey Hepburn and a Cirque de Soleil performer (mimes not included). Rob doesn't see the connection between Nina and the snake, but Tyra thinks Nina and the snake are interacting fantastically. Nina has been queen of social media for three weeks, and continues to rock it. Nina gets a 6 from Rob, 9 from Kelly, and 10 from Tyra. Jeremy is , and Kelly tells him that he has a distorted body and looks like the butler for Siegfried and Roy. By butler she means poolboy. And by poolboy she means…well, you know. Rob, who is determined to feel the opposite way from Kelly about everything, likes the shot well enough. He says that Jeremy is finally working his body appropriately. Tyra pipes in to say that she doesn't see Siegfried and Roy…she sees Liberace. Whichever way you slice it: butt sex. Kelly notes that they're in the same genre of "gay Vegas." Tyra adds that Chris has makeup that feminizes his face, and needs to make his features harder if he doesn't want to look like a girl. Or a campy gayicon. Social media is super into Jeremy though, and thinks that he's stepping up his game. Jeremy gets 7s from Tyra and Kelly and an 8 from Rob.
Jourdan is . Rob says that with the wig and makeup you have to second guess whether that's her or not, which he notes will take her far in this industry. Tyra, however, doesn't think that it's a good thing. It's about branding, and she should be recognizable. And then Tyra says that Jourdan looks like someone she'd find in one of her mom's catalogues. Like, some Newport News shit. Kelly thinks that Jourdan looks like a 53-year old ex supermodel with four ex-husbands. Jourdan gets an 8 from Kelly, 7 from Rob, and 6 from Tyra. Finally there's Marvin. He also looks way too gay for Kelly in his macaw photo, and she can't find one thing in the picture that she likes. She wonders if she was tricked into liking him earlier in the season by his personality alone. Rob also thinks that the photo is weak, and that Marvin looks like Boy George. Tyra likes it, though, and says that Marvin is pushing and giving something rather than standing there. Fans love it too, as does Bryanboy. Marvin gets a 6 from Rob, 7 from Kelly, and 8 from Tyra.
The scores are tabulated, and it turns out that Nina has best photo of the week. Again! She got a fan vote of 7.3 and total score of 38.3. Renee is with a fan vote of -- ouch -- 3.9 and a total of 36.9. Hip and a dip indeed. Jeremy is called with a fan vote of 6.8 and total of 36.8. Then there's Cory with a fan vote of 5.4 and total of 35.4; Jourdan with a fan vote of 4.9 and total of 34.9; and Chris with a fan vote of 4.5 and total of 33.5. This leaves biffles Marvin and Don in the bottom two. They put arms around one another's' shoulders as Tyra tells them that the photo in her hands represents the beautiful man who is still in the running towards becoming America's Top Model. Marvin has charisma and charm and beautiful photos week after week. But those things can only take him so far. Don, meanwhile, has the rare combination of being street-fine and having model looks too. But there are some weeks and some photos that make the judges wonder if he's really a model. So who stays in the competition? It's Marvin, whose fan vote of 5.6 and total of 32.6 bests Don, with a fan vote of 5.3 and total of 32.3.
Marvin starts crying and Don hugs him before Tyra tells him to be more consistent. Don seems the slightest bit relieved as Tyra hugs him and tells him to study his face and his angles. He's disappointed since he wanted to move forward, and also felt his picture was way better than Chris's. But Don will continue to pursue music and modeling, and tells us that he's hoping to see Marvin take it all. And with that, Don's beautiful blue eyes walk out of our lives forever.
time: Nina still can't get it through her head that Chris is a dope. Marvin wants to kiss Renee on top of an elephant, and Chris gets frustrated during a photo shoot.