Kotu enter to pick Tony's mysterious brain. Scott asks why they want a comic book character. Fun-loving Tony claims that Zappos is all about the good times. Tom takes it a step further and asks if it can be funny. Tony nearly looks offended at this rather straightforward, banal question. He deems comedy "not unacceptable." What a weirdo. Tom keeps on with the riff on comedy, and Tony gets the same horrified look on his face he got when Melissa asked about his girlfriend's hair color. SAT problem for you: ____ : funny :: gay : straight? Tom continues babbling, until he claims that some characters are "very... corporate." And bingo, Tom Green! Corporate : funny :: gay : straight. Scott curtails that tangent and asks if anyone else has questions. No one does, so they end.
Meanwhile, Athena gets down to business. Annie points out the flaw that Khloe herself admitted re: Khloe's appointment as PM -- the task is not about retail. A correct observation, yes, but Annie's still an asshole. Brande kicks off the discussion. And by "discussion," I mean chorus of clucking. Seriously, everyone just talks at the same time for, like, 32 hours. Khloe does very little to diffuse the din. Claudia takes this reticence not only as weak leadership but also as a sign of the presence of too many Alpha Bitches on the team. Joan proposes their superhero be -- get ready for it -- a midget. Awesome. Ain't nothin' gonna be better than that, y'all. A couple beats later, everyone puts away their "What the fuck?!" faces and starts clucking again. Claudia THs a nice bookend to that moment, opining, "If I could have one super power, I would SHUT UP my team."
Before we get back to the whirlwind of creativity, it's time for Trump 101. This week's lesson: Handle pressure, or people will walk all over you. He thinks that, of this week's two PMs, gold medal winner Scott should be better equipped to achieve this objective.
Back in Athena's war room, still no progress. Melissa notes a lot of conflict and very little focus. Joan comes up with yet another brilliant gimmick: Insomnia! Silence yet again. Finally, Khloe starts speaking up but is quickly subverted by Annie, who decides they should delegate. She thinks there should be an art group and a script group. She wants to head the script group, and she THs that she doesn't care if people's feelings are hurt along the way to a win. And by which we mean Joan, who takes umbrage that she, the Emmy-winning writer of television stage, and screen, can't lead the script team. She calls Annie stupid.
Over at Kotu, Scott gives a crappy pep talk which boils down to "No chaos!" They bandy about the idea of using one of themselves as the superhero for a bit, but that notion is quickly pooh-poohed. Dennis really starts thinking out of the box, so to speak, when he suggests a transvestite superhero. Cue head scratching and eye popping. Scott rightly points out that Zappos is a family brand and might not be that into trannies. Dennis and Tom riff on that for what seems like an eternity. Given the number of uncomfortable faces in the board room, why is no one putting an end to this?
Back at Athena, Annie is futzing around at an easel writing things like "Wow!" on an oversized notepad. Khloe finally settled into her PM role and begins to redirect the group, though she doesn't go so far as to rip the magic marker out of Annie's hand. Damn. Claudia gives Khloe credit for taking the bull by the horn. The ladies come to a consensus that their superhero should be a lady. They're interrupted when the artists come to design the comic book story board.
Another set of designers visit the men simultaneously, despite the men's utter lack of ideas. Clint proceeds to cut off Jesse (and everyone else) about a million times, though he has no patience for anyone interrupting him. Eventually, Clint's lingus interruptus descends into a verbal slap fight when Dennis is the only man with the brass to stand up to this rudeness. Because it is Dennis, though, he goes about it in the entirely wrong way, and the artists end up having to wait, pencil in hand, while these two a-holes duke it out. Tom notes that Scott stood there silently when he should have been diffusing the argument.
Athena finally makes some progress when Claudia perpetuates archaic gender stereotypes by coming up with the idea that their superhero-to-be should be a disgruntled housewife. Joan chips in that her superhero name should be "Mizz Z." Claudia is proud of her idea. Don Jr. checks up on the ladies. Melissa updates him on their progress, and he asks who came up with the concept and slogan. Melissa takes the credit, even though it was clearly none of her doing. Claudia is pissed, but she doesn't want to make her team look bad in front of Don Jr., so she sits quietly. Later, the focus group joins the ladies. Claudia pitches her idea to the group to the guys, whom Khloe characterizes "typical comic book readers," a.k.a. massive geeks. They prove that her judgment is spot-on. Overall, they spend most of the time ogling Brande and Claudia rather than giving constructive suggestions outside of "bigger belt buckle!"
Somewhere else in Manhattan, Joan and the ladies visit the costume shop. Natalie admits she thinks the pleather Striperella costume is a little extreme. Do they make argyle pleather? That might be more up her alley. The guys march their parade of disorganization down to Brooklyn to make their costume. While Dennis puts together an ensemble for Saturday night, Jesse capitalizes on his design skills to design the outfit with Brian. Scott calls them to explain the ridiculous name he has chosen in a moment of panic. Needless to say, they're all, "Huh?"
Night falls, and the women are still in the war room. Claudia has mysteriously fallen ill. Suddenly, I know why homegirl's so thin, because she looks like she is going through some serious withdrawal. She asks if she can leave early, despite the fact she's delivering the presentation tomorrow. Annie shits all over that decision. What else is new?
Over at Kotu, Tom nances around annoying everyone and/or being ignored and/or making hilarious reaction faces. He questions calling the character EEE yet again. Scott looks at him, like, "Are you really going there? Now? Again?" Scott dons his martyr hat, claiming that Tom is his Achilles' heel and that he's had to suffer in silence. Or you could be the PM and tell him to shut up and sit down. Since he's obviously adding nothing of value to this room, Tom heads to another room for the explicit purpose of performing a dramatic monologue replete with arm waving and observations that EEE is a bra size, not a name. Good point, actually. [You know your team is screwed when Tom Green is the one making the most sense. - Angel]
The morning, Kotu prepares for the presentation. Tom continues his foolery, including but not limited to slicking his hair back in the most unfortunate way. Scott continues singing his one-note tune about derailment. Oh, add in a back flip, already. To be fair, though, Tom actually interrupts one of Scott's interviews in progress! He's such an irrepressible button pusher, I think I might fall prey to it, too. But from the outside, awesome. Everyone heads back inside, and they discuss who should actually present the superhero character to Tony from Zappos. Scott proposes Clint, which ruffles some feathers. TH Jesse even pulls out the air quotes to make it crystal clear that "Clint Black = Douche Bag."
Elsewhere, the girls are racing against the clock to finish their presentation prep. Brande even takes her shoes off so she can run faster. Normally, it would be fine... except she's on New York City streets. I think I just caught a few diseases from watching this fuckery. Granted, Brande is a Playboy bunny, so she probably knows a thing or two about disease treatment.
, Trump asks Erin and Don to show each team the opposing team's work for a critique. They both note the similarities in storyline, but the women quickly point out that "EEE" was an inexplicable name choice. Scott claims they were being "off-the-wall." Trump shoots that explanation down. Tom takes this opportunity to publicly state that he objected to "EEE." Trump asks Claudia if she thinks their team won. She says yes, despite her stumbles. She blames the drugs for her eff ups. (I knew it!) For the most part, though, the women have her back. It should be noted that Annie, the woman who is always talking, stays silent.
And now the moment of truth. Trump announces that the women won. Khloe takes 20 grand for her charity, The Brent Shapiro Foundation. Trump dismisses the ladies, leaving the men in the boardroom to fight to the death (I wish!). [That would make the second hour of this show worth it. - AC] Commercials.
When we return, the ladies celebrate with champagne. Khloe explains that her charity raises money to raise awareness about addictions. The women plan to go three in a row or more, and Melissa clicks on the monitor to see what's happening downstairs. Trump lets Scott say his piece first, though he does interrupt to point out that Scott had a hard time controlling his team. Scott points the finger at Tom. Tom claims he was trying to offer options. Scott claims Tom sold himself more than the product during the focus group. He accuses Tom of playing a game rather than working with the team. Trump asks if anyone objected to the name EEE. Tom proudly steps up to say he was. Scott says he felt like Tom was fighting him every step of the way. Tom claims he wanted to win and knew that EEE didn't make any sense. Upstairs, Natalie chimes in that using EEE to signify Zappos is like Trump using an MMM to signify his brand. Nice. That almost makes up for the backstabbing bitchery in front of cagey Tony.
Back downstairs, Trump asks Herschel who he would fire. Herschel points to Tom. Tom presumes Herschel misunderstood what Tom was bringing to the group. Herschel does not take kindly to that remark. Trump notes that Herschel is a fighter since he clawed his way out of the board room last week. Then again, when the other guys in there are Dennis Rodman and Andrew "I Don't Believe in Baking" Dice Clay, it's not that much of a fight... Trump gets Tom to admit he wouldn't fight Herschel. Thanks for that pointless bit of obviously, Donny T. Trump asks Brian who he would fire. Brian says semi-hatefully "Whoever came up with that name." He claims he doesn't know who that was, which is a total lie. He also snickers a little when he points out that costume he had a hand in creating features a Z, not an EEE. Oh, that Brian McKnight is a snake in the grass, he is. Just you wait...