Episode Report Card Demian: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Somewhere, Sigmund Freud spins in his grave
By Demian | Season 3 | Episode 15 | Aired on 02.21.2001
P3. Patty and Victor snipe at each other as they enter. Patty accuses Victor of "always [managing] to say the wrong thing" to their daughters when the three Ps were children. Victor counters that Patty makes that claim only because she tried to raise the Ps "as witches, rather than as little girls." They stop arguing to gaze guiltily at the downcast Piper, who perches forlornly on a stool at the bar. They walk over to Piper as she apologizes "for letting everybody down." Patty tries to comfort her, telling Piper she should be proud she and the Dolt made it as far as they did. Piper dismisses this, noting, "As Halliwells, we are blessed as witches, but cursed as women." I seem to recall the exact same line being deployed in a conversation between Phoebe and Grams during that hour-long crapfest otherwise known as "Magic Hour," but I'm too lazy to look it up. Piper tells her parents she thinks of both their failed marriage and the numerous marital mishaps Grams endured, and winds up supposing the women of her family "are destined to end up alone." Patty splutters a bit, not knowing how to respond. Victor steps in, asking Piper if she thinks he and her mother were "cursed." Piper hems and haws a bit over that question. Victor tells Piper that, despite the failure of his marriage, that marriage did manage to produce something good: Piper and her sisters. Perhaps his personal "destiny" was simply to be their father. Piper smiles sadly at this and apologizes again, telling her parents she needs to spend some time alone. Piper disappears into the back room as Patty turns to Victor with, "Not bad for a guy who always says the wrong thing." Victor thanks his dead ex-wife and adds, "I just wish I knew that it helped."
Manor parlor. Phoebe leafs through the BoS and lands on a page that captures her attention. "Gotcha!" she says, and we cut to AP Prue straddling Bobby beneath a tree. Get your minds out of the gutter: they're both fully clothed. AP Prue, however, is doing her best to rectify that situation, unbuttoning Bobby's shirt as they flirt. Bobby wants to know how long AP Prue will "stick around this time." AP Prue asks him what he means. Bobby wants to know if she's going to vanish on him again. AP Prue can't say for certain, as she's "living moment-to-moment" now that she's "free for the first time in [her] life." Bobby has no problem with that, and they mack. Shimmering noises intrude, and AP Prue dismounts Bobby to hide in the bushes. AP Prue latches onto a tree trunk and shouts that she will not allow herself to be pulled away.
Guess again, sweetie. AP Prue dematerializes from the underbrush and pops up in the manor parlor. Phoebe, jaw set, slams the BoS shut with, "Neat spell, huh?" The two get up in each other's business. Phoebe demands to know what AP Prue thinks she's doing. AP Prue tells Phoebe to leave her the hell alone, and refuses to reconnect with Special Ed Prue. "I'm never going back," AP Prue insists, stomping out to the front door. Phoebe grabs her, and AP Prue tosses her to the floor. Phoebe retaliates by slinging AP Prue into an armchair. AP Prue announces that she's had enough of Special Ed Prue's life of duty. She wants a life of her own, one in which she is free to do as she pleases. Phoebe plays the responsibility card. AP Prue throws it back in her face, snarking that Phoebe was hardly behaving responsibly when she fell in love with a demon. "Oh, please," Phoebe snorts. "You have got to let this whole Cole thing go. You can't stay mad at me forever." Word. AP Prue reveals that she was never angry with Phoebe for Cole. She was, in fact, "rooting" for Phoebe. Special Ed Prue was the one with all the problems.