Episode Report Card Niki: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Flirting with Disaster
By Niki | Season 2 | Episode 12 | Aired on 02.06.2001
Just then, some chick urgently busts in saying that Steve needs Crusty to look at some graphics. Crusty asks if it can wait, and the girl insists that they were supposed to go online two hours ago. Crusty hightails it out of there, and Graham sits on the edge of the desk, leaning in to whisper to Lily, "Well, this is a first." Lily whispers back that she feels "totally uncomfortable about this." Graham points out that Crusty won't take his help any other way, and Lily whines, "I don't like lying, even if it's for a good cause." She insists that she should have just told Crusty it was Graham's idea from the start. "She didn't even give you credit for it," Graham says. "I'm sitting here listening while she pitches you your own idea, which she thinks she stole from me while you pretend to think about it," Lily observes, appearing to relish it just a little. Frankly, I don't know how she can keep a straight face while Crusty so blatantly makes an ass of herself. Then again, she pulls it off the rest of the time. Graham asks how he did with the acting, to which Lily responds, "Shut up!" But she says it with a smile. Crusty walks in just in time to catch the last bit, and asks why Lily is telling Graham to shut it. Graham bullshits some cover and then says he has to "go be two places at once." He pauses in the doorway to say he thinks it's a good idea and that they should run with it. Lily sits trying to look impassive while Crusty recites, "That which does not kill me makes me strong." Strong like cheap-ass aftershave, maybe. Lily says she thinks it went well. Crusty turns with a saccharine smile, snarks that it couldn't be better, and then starts moaning that she's sure "this is [her] next life lesson. You know, that [she] didn't get in [her] last life. 'Cause [she] must've done something really bad in that life." Huh. If karma really is kicking Crusty in the ass this time around, it's nothing compared to what she's got coming in the next round. She'll have to come back as the lint in a baboon's belly button. Anyway, Lily still manages a straight face, which is most impressive. She leans in and says, "Did you ever think that maybe he's not that evil? That all he wants is to get the magazine on its feet?" Crusty ponders this for about an eighth of a second before curtly responding, "No." Lily sits back, defeated.
Cut to Booklovers; Karen has just entered. She admits to Judy that she's not there to shop, she's using it as an "assignation" because she forgot the name of a restaurant nearby. Judy wants to know who the "assignee" is. Karen makes her uptight face, and Judy looks excited. "Ooo, I finally get to meet Leo," she chirps. She's in a really good mood. I'm hoping it's a sign of some off-screen Glucking. Karen answers, "For what it's worth." Whoa, Karen you should tone down the enthusiasm. The other customers are starting to stare. Judy picks up on it, but Karen assures her that things are fine. "I told you, it's just...silly," she says. Judy wants to know why enjoying yourself is silly. Karen thinks things are "supposed to be going somewhere" and says she feels "so stupid just existing." Would you feel smarter if you were dead? Her hang-ups irritate me. They're totally understandable and everything, but I hate it when people let "should" and "supposed to" govern their lives and happiness. I think these are concepts that need to be removed from the language. But I digress.