Episode Report Card Niki: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Where's That High Road?
By Niki | Season 2 | Episode 7 | Aired on 12.18.2000
They enter a place called How U Bean ["to me it looked rather like a Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf I've patronized in Burbank" -- Wing Chun], and Grace spots Jake sitting there with a woman who most certainly is not Tiffany. It's the "guy" he had to do business with -- you remember, the chick in LAVENDER from the restaurant. Grace stops dead when she sees him, and her smile vanishes. Jake knows he's busted, but he tries to play it off legit. He checks his watch and wonders why she's out of the movie so early. He recovers quickly enough to introduce Grace and her friend to Ronnie, "a friend from the restaurant." "A very loyal customer," Ronnie adds. Grace's smile could shred bullets.
Cut to Grace looking out the passenger window of Jake's car. Her jaw is set and she looks disgusted. Jake asks if she's sure she doesn't want to drive. He gets a terse reply. A few seconds pass. "Sooo," he girlfriends, looking for the skinny on her date. Grace says Spencer was "okay." "You like him as a friend. Uh-oh," Jake jokes. Grace stares at her lap. Jake wants to know if something happened. Grace says that "boys are just weird." "In my experience, they're matched only by the weirdness of girls," Jake opines. Grace thinks he's insane. After a few seconds, she nonchalantly asks, "So, where's Tiffany tonight?" Jake hems and haws and lies out his ass, but Grace isn't buying a word of it. She looks pained to realize what an jerk her father is, and that he's continuing his cheating ways.
We return from commercials to find ourselves in Lily's kitchen, where Zoe is preparing a demonstration of her volcano erupting. Lily asks Grace about her date. "Mom, just because I tell you about something, doesn't mean I want to talk about it all the time," Grace informs her. Zoe chimes in that Grace talked about it all night on the phone with Jolie. "Didn't anyone ever tell you not to eavesdrop, miniature person?" Grace snipes. "Dork," Zoe retorts. Grace says that Zoe doesn't even know what a dork is. "Yes I do. It's a whale anus," Zoe says matter-of-factly. Now, I don't know what the actual, literal definition is for dork, either, but I'm totally willing to adopt Zoe's version. Lily directs Zoe's attention back to the volcano, and Zoe sets the eruption in motion. Red goo burbles and gurgles out of its top as Zoe squeals excitedly and Lily examines her floor in speechless horror. Zoe is thrilled until she realizes that the "lava" has oozed onto her shirt. She runs from the room to deal with it. Lily takes another stab at talking about Grace's date. She eagerly asks if he was nice, and says that Jake liked him. Grace asks what Jake said, and where he said he saw them, then gets cagey when Lily asks why.