Episode Report Card Jessica: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Box And The Bunny
By Jessica | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 10.04.2006
...the driver texts Wilhelmina that Betty has lost The Book. Wilhelmina, as you can imagine, is thrilled by this development. She is also wearing too much makeup.
Daniel paces his office and waits for Betty. Amanda sticks her head in the room and tells him that "Vampira" told her to tell Daniel that they're still waiting on his notes. Dude. Daniel. Flex your power. Act like the boss and postpone your meeting.
Enter Betty. "Not seeing The Book in your hands," Daniel says. Betty tells him that Gina Gambaro has it. "Gambaro? Is that a new designer?" Daniel asks, looking perplexed. "No, it's an OLD SLUT," Betty spits, before explaining the whole convoluted situation. Daniel, not surprisingly, isn't very pleased: "You don't lie to me. Ever! We're on the same team." And they are, in his words, royally screwed on the Natalie Whitman issue. "Why? Because there are pictures out there of what she actually looks like?" Betty asks. "Exactly!" Daniel says. He tells her to go downstairs, because they're heading for Queens. Betty reminds him about the 10 AM meeting, and he goes in there and DOESN'T tell everyone that he's busy and will give notes later, but instead tells them that he has no notes. Except, presumably, to swap out the Natalie Whitman photos. Why doesn't he tell them to get started on that? Anyway, Wilhelmina, knowing that he's Bookless, announces that SHE needs The Book back so that she can give her notes. Daniel sputters that, um, he needs to look at The Book one more time. Just...in case. He'll see them all in three hours! "Great to see everyone! Jeff, how's the wife?" Daniel chirps as he bolts for the door. Jeff sadly announces that they're separating. "Great to hear it," Daniel sings, and books out of there. No pun intended.
Meanwhile, Betty finds a picture of her precious bunny in the toilet. The bunny is in the toilet, not the picture. Nor does she find the picture in the toilet. The picture is on her desk. Oh, you know what I mean. Enraged, Betty climbs on her chair, Norma Rae-style, and demands to know who, exactly, thinks this is so funny. Everyone around her raises his or her hand. Betty announces that they're not going to break her that easily, and then runs out to Queens with Daniel....
...where they discover that someone has already paid Gina's ransom for The Book. DUM DUM DUM DUM.
After the ads, Gina is describing for Daniel the person who took The Book, while Walter -- who is installing Gina's new plasma TV -- is promising Betty that he's just there to work. He doesn't even LIKE Gina anymore. Betty doesn't care, and she wasn't that thrilled by his gift, she tells him. Walter looks hangdog: "Don't you remember? When we first started dating? And you stopped by ProBuy? I was doing shipping and receiving? And you bought a box of nine-volts? It was the first time we kissed? And you said, 'Be careful.'" Betty smiles and finishes his thought: "'We're gonna cause a spark.' Yeah." Aw. Dork love. Daniel comes over and interrupts this tender moment: he and Betty need to go figure out who has the damn Book. Walter finally turns on the new TV, which is helpfully tuned to the FashionTV channel: The news of the lost Book has leaked already. Blondie Anchor tells us all that The Book is full of "horrifying unretouched photos of Natalie Whitman, still carrying her Jenna Fletcher weight like an albatross." Blondie promises the viewing audience that when those pictures turn up, FashionTV will immediately broadcast them: "Remember, we only make others feel bad to make YOU feel good." Hear, hear!