Episode Report Card Sars: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Baby blues
By Sars | Season 4 | Episode 19 | Aired on 04.24.2001
Sars: Dude, the table, now move.
Contrivance: Okay, got it. Sure you don't wanna come out with me?
Sars: And watch Deus Ex Machina slobber all over some subplot in a halter top? I'll pass.
Contrivance: Okay, then. See you later!
More exposition from the doctor, more grousing from Gale, and then Dawson comes in: "So I take it there's no baby yet?" Gale and The Flash shake their heads in irritation. Oh, please. It's not an appointment with the cable guy; it's a baby. Babies come when they want to come. You've already done this once, so you should know that. Simmer down. ["Of course, it's been so long since they had a kid that the first one's balding, so maybe they've just forgotten." -- Wing Chun] The doctor expositions that the baby may not show up for a few more days, and "normally" she'd have no cause for concern, but given Gale's age, "there's a significantly increased risk of complications." Dawson gets up in the doctor's face and wants to know what kind of complications, and Gale and the Flash look worried, and again I say, "Oh, please." First of all, Gale's not that old, and second of all, I think she and the Flash would have discussed any possible age-related concerns with the OB well before she came into the hospital to give birth. Like, say, at her first appointment. Anyway, the doctor says that if the baby doesn't come on its own in a few days, she'll induce labor, and if anything goes wrong, they've got "a great facility here to do an immediate C[-section]." "Oh my god," Gale dramas. Shut up, Gale. The doctor tells Gale to chill. The Flash asks if there's anything they can do to help the baby along, and the doctor recommends talking to the fetus: "What's your baby's name?" Guilty looks from the parents and a smart-off from Dawson let us know that they haven't picked a name yet. The doctor writes Gale a prescription and takes off. What's the prescription? "Name your baby." Like, ha ha. Not.
Tutoring center. Jack's tutoree, Will, bulldozes another line reading, complaining that the story he's reading doesn't have a hero and blah blah blah. "Give Me Liberty Or Give Me" Tobey tries to jolly Will along, talking about how the most interesting heroes have problems they can't overcome despite themselves, and as Jack "Forsake This" McPhee bustles in all late, Tobey cracks, "Like pathological tardiness." Jack, hanging up his jacket, says that many heroes do overcome their flaws, and Tobey grins that he'll believe it when he sees it, and there's more banter about heroes getting stuck in traffic. Boy, that Tobey has a lovely smile. Will interrupts, "If you two don't mind -- I'm trying to pass the fourth grade here?" Good line, awful delivery. The actor who plays Will is an adorable kid, but...dude. He's terrible.