Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | 3 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Like A Virgin
By Wing Chun | Season 3 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.28.1999
Blink.
So there's new opening credits. There's Dawson with his hair looking much blonder, and less greasy, than in the scene we just watched. There's Joey with the good-thing-it's-not-five-years-old-oh-wait-it-is Rachel haircut. There's Jen looking like she dropped about fifteen pounds from her face, with sort of ratty, overly-gelled wavy hair, and there's Pacey looking oddly brown, but not like he has a tan -- just like he's covered in an extremely even layer of dirt. And then there's Jack and Andie, whose images have made it into the credits. Andie's hair is blonde again, and a lot less flat than last year.
Okay, I have no problem with Gap hiring bored-looking models to sing in their ads, but how hard would it have been for them to cast models who can actually sing? In unison singing, it's kind of important that everyone be on-key.
Joey "He's my father! He's a dealer! He's my father and a dealer!" Potter is on a dock pumping gas into someone's boat and checking her watch. A guy -- presumably her boss -- comes up behind her and says he'll take it from there. She growls that he was supposed to be there at eight. He patronizes her and her wish not to be late on her first day of school. She says her last class ends at 2:30 and that she should be back at work by 3:00. He tells her not to be late. She gives him one parting glare and trots up the dock, presumably to change clothes, although her gas-station-attendant shirt looks adorable on her. My prediction for these two is either that they'll embark on a scandalous (consensual) love affair, or that he will sexually harass and/or assault her.
At Grams's house, Jack "Quarterback Princess" McPhee and Jen "Dick" Lindley efficiently prepare breakfast in perfect synch. Grams "Loving Mrs." Ryan watches the whole spectacle from the hallway until they both look up and, in unison, ask "what?" She asks, "And how long have you two been married?" Jack and Jen exchange a look. My prediction is that these two will become the Justin and Kaia of Dawson's Creek, and will have minimal interaction with the rest of the cast throughout this season.
Pacey "Proactiv" Witter eats breakfast at Estrangement Estates (formerly the No-Fault Hacienda) and is asking what happened when Dawson woke up, and Dawson tells him that Bus Girl had morphed into "an octogenarian Spanish woman with a hairy lip." Dawson says it was weird, because one moment she was the perfect woman sitting next to him, and then the next moment (insert clichéd finger-snap here) she was gone. Pacey says, "Usually when I have moments like that, I've got to change the sheets afterwards."