Episode Report Card Sara M: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Elephantitis
By Sara M | Season 17 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.16.2008
"Is GC sad or something?" Kelly asks. You know what, Kelly? If you don't have any to contribute to a conversation other than a question with a totally obvious answer, then maybe you should consider not speaking up at all. Matty says he thinks so. "Like he misses home, or?" Kelly asks. Ace observes all of this and couldn't be happier. He says his tribe is falling apart, and today's argument was "brilliant." You'd think he'd at least get the English accent back when he was saying Englishy things, but no. Ace says he couldn't have planned that argument better himself. Which is good, since I have yet to see him actually plan anything. Seems to me he just sits around watching as everyone else self-destructs, and then tries to make it look like he's somehow responsible.
Crystal has to go into the hut to apologize to Big Baby GC, saying she was just joking with the eat your rice commands. I think it was very big of her to do that (then again, everything about Crystal is big), but he doesn't even answer her. He tells us he's had enough with the people he's out here with and needs to get back to real life, where apparently no one bosses him around, because this game is changing him, and not for the better. How sad for GC that he doesn't realize that the person he's turning into in this game is the person he really is, because maybe then he could learn something and be a better person. "I got to figure some things out," he says.
GC is still there after the break when Fang gets the treemail, which gives clues about gravity and comes with a small ball. Crystal thinks they're going to be inside the ball and rolled down a hill, which would be extremely ambitious for a Survivor challenge, but they did step it up with plexiglass in the reward challenge, so who knows? No one looks particularly thrilled about the upcoming challenge. Matty tells us that he doesn't have high hopes for their chances today because the Fang tribe is falling apart, mainly GC and Crystal. Crystal seems fine to me. The Worst Olympian Ever, but fine. While the rest of the tribe is enjoying a hearty pre-challenge meal of rice, GC takes the kayak out. Oh, is he going to drown himself? That would be intense.
Matty and Ken arrive at the dock to look for GC, but nowhere to be seen. Wow, he paddled off pretty damn fast, didn't he? That's the most effort he's shown since he ran for the immunity idol necklace. Ken tells us that GC disappeared right before the challenge. Huh. Can he do that? The producers don't corral him and force him to go back to camp? Did he go off to be with the elephant and kill himself? This is bizarre! Kelly comes forward and says that if they can't find GC in time, they'll have to leave without him, and now they'll be one tribe member down. Haaa hahahaha! He's gone beyond quitting during challenges -- now he's quitting even before them! I didn't even think that was possible! It could be a Survivor first! Even Kathy and Janu didn't quit DURING A CHALLENGE! Kelly, Matty and Ken search the lake for a sign of GC. "What if he got eaten by like a monkey, dude?" Kelly asks. Hey! Look at her, being funny and possibly pleasant to be around. I bet Jacquie wouldn't have made a joke like that. Ken tells us that he hopes GC comes back in time on his own because he's well aware of how GC doesn't like being told what to do, so he can't be ordered to come back to camp. "That's how he rolls," Ken says. And how does Ken roll? With an epic barrel roll in Starfox. You love it, video game nerds!