Episode Report Card Couch Baron: C+ | 1 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Next Time, Just Count To Ten
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 14 | Aired on 07.29.1999
We open on a cloud of steam, and then it dissipates to reveal Crichton and D'Argo. HoYay aficionados, make of that what you will. They're somewhere in Moya's bowels trying to fix some problem, and Crichton whiningly asks why these things are always his fault, prompting D'Argo grumpily to correct him that they're merely almost always his fault. I suppose that makes sense -- Aeryn's too competent to cause problems, Zhaan's too peaceful, and Rygel's too lazy. Good thing for Crichton that Chiana's going to be showing up soon. They succeed only in releasing a cloud of foul-smelling gas, and Crichton exposits that the "blockage" they're trying to fix is a by-product of Moya's pregnancy, while D'Argo blames Crichton for firing Farscape One's engines in the transport hangar. Crichton further exposits that that was the last of his fuel, so now he's completely dependent on Leviathan technology, and then, having had enough bickering, stomps off...... only to run into Zhaan, who asks if anything's wrong. Crichton says he's fed up, and then they have an all-too-typical translator microbe mix-up, causing Crichton to snit, "It was vaguely -- vaguely amusing the first six billion times." Here's an expression that won't be hard to translate: Says you. Crichton proceeds to bite Zhaan's head off for no reason...
... and then, suited up, he's telling Aeryn that he's going for a drive. She tries to comprehend what he's on about, but understandably fails, given that they probably don't have an expression for "riding a wild hair" in Sebacean. Seriously, this behavior of Crichton's is underdeveloped and kind of preposterous fourteen episodes in, but I suppose we can cheat a bit and just add it in to the seventeen billion times in the series that he's completely out of his gourd. D'Argo yells that he needs Crichton, as "this backwash is building up too fast," but Crichton is unmoved, and we cut to him flying away.
On the bridge, Rygel's amusing himself with a game when D'Argo and Zhaan stride in. The former tells us that Moya is experiencing "an extreme increase in her amnexus systems," and Pilot explains that she thinks her fetus is at risk for some reason, and she's "decompensating." The crew recoils in horror as they realize that that means Moya is about to starburst. Zhaan frantically instructs Pilot to get Crichton back on board, but he tells her there's no time...
... and outside, Crichton is quite close to Moya when he sees the blue lines of starburst coming toward him. In a matter of seconds, he gets knocked away, and Moya is gone. He mutters, "I am a dead man." And he hasn't even met Scorpius yet. Credits.