Episode Report Card Erin: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Whaddya mean his name ISN'T MICHAEL VAUGHN?
By Erin | Season 4 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.24.2005
Marshall locates the name of a Russian military dude and says that if they get the right dirt on this guy, he'll be begging to give them the code. Weiss is all, what's this guy into? Marshall's all, let's take a look, shall we? He brings up a file, and all we hear as they look at the laptop is a man kind of grunting and a woman kind of laughing and Marshall's face is like, "DAMN," and Weiss's face is like, "EW," and Marshall's all, dude, what IS THAT and Weiss is all, is that a GOAT? And then Weiss turns his head to the side, almost hanging it upside down, and he just says, "Wow." HEE. One of the most enjoyable parts of the episode, if you don't mind my saying so. Weiss immediately gets on the horn to Jack and tells him about what they're doing. Jack tells the rest of the team. Yes, it's just that interesting.
Jack quips something to Irina about how her fellow countrymen are stubborn and she's all, yeah, well, we just like to believe we can control our fates. But you've never believed in fate or destiny, have you? Jack's all, oh, sure I have! About as much as I believe in horoscopes and the tooth fairy! Oh, and fortune cookies! I love those! Just then, a horse whinnies in the distance and Irina turns to look. A beautiful white horse walks through the streets, the red light from above making it look like it's red instead of white. I'm only half-surprised that it's not a damn unicorn. Irina says, "Rambaldi wrote, 'When blood-red horses roam the streets and angels fall from the sky, the Chosen One and The Passenger will clash. And only one of them will survive.'" And it's a testament to the talent and gravitas of Lena Olin that this line comes across as anything but hilarious.
"You really are through the looking glass, aren't you?" Jack says to her. "When I see angels fall from the sky, I'll start to worry." Then I'd start worrying right about now, Jack, seeing as the Family Bristow could very well be considered the aforementioned angels in this scenario. Irina can't shake the feeling that tonight one of her daughters will perish. Jack may have a snarky comment for this announcement as well, but we don't get to hear it because RPB has found the entrance to the subway system. He gets to work on the lock as Sydney comments, "Looks like that ear healed up pretty nicely." "Yeah," he smiles, "and if you, uh, plan on putting any more holes in me? Just go ahead and tell me now. All right?" I'm sure she'd tell you, Robert. Unfortunately, the zombie on the other side of the gate isn't so courteous. He just runs Robert through with a big pipe and boom, the cameo, she is over. Everyone shoots the shit out of the zombie and it takes several rounds to bring him down. Robert uses his last dying breaths to tell everyone to go and end this madness! The Spy Family moves into the subway system.