Episode Report Card Lady Lola: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Prenuptial Disagreements
By Lady Lola | Season 4 | Episode 21 | Aired on 05.13.2010
Tubas & Turmeric
Jack: How was your dinner?
Nancy: I'm stuffed, that place was good! Way better than the Indian joint I go to in Boston -- O'Doyle's.
Jack: You know what I like after too much curry? A warm glass of milk and some John Philip Sousa marches.
Olympic Game
Lemon: I've been through every guy. There's no one left
Jenna: Come on, you sound like me at the Olympic Village.
Lemon: Ugh, so what if I go to Floyd's wedding alone? Maybe I'll just lean into it and bring a cat in a baby stroller.
And Now for a Glimpse into Tracy's Storied Past
Tracy: It's all coming back to me. Oh my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a rib cage -- a rib cage! Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason! Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish!
And later...
Tracy: All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen -- a crackhead breastfeeding a rat, a homeless man licking a Hot Pocket off the third rail of the G train!
And still later...
Tracy: I've seen a blind guy bite a police horse! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time! I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!
2012: The Olympocalypse
Lemon: This is just a date, Wesley.
Wesley: You know that's not true. I wouldn't be here if there was anybody else. I'm your best option, and you're mine. You see, I lost my job two days ago, and I'm now facing a little residency issue.
Lemon: What?
Wesley: I won't go back there, Liz. I can't suffer through the London Olympics. We're not prepared, Liz! Did you see the Beijing opening ceremonies? We don't have control over our people like that.
When in Toys 'R' Us, Do As the Plushies Do
Lemon: Excuse me, do you have a job and are you here with someone?
Mike: Ummm, I'm a lawyer, and I'm single.
Lemon: Okay, friend, here's the deal -- my name is Liz. I almost got 1200 on my SATs, and I need a date for this wedding, and I like your head shape. What do you say?
Mike: I would love to be your date, Liz. I like how forward you are. And may I tell you something? I'm a plushie.
Lemon: Is that a fraternity?
Mike: Kind of. It means I belong to a group of like-minded people who dress in mascot costumes--
Lemon: Oh!
Mike: And have orgies in hotel rooms and state parks--
Lemon: There it is!
Mike: Our term for intercourse is "yiffing."
Lemon: Would you excuse me, please?