Untitled


Episode Report Card Sobell: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT To Thine Own Self Be True

By Sobell | Season 4 | Episode 12 | Aired on 11.24.2008

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Oh, this show! The opening -- which has Team Scylla getting the drop on General Von Baldy and his goons in a total "Gotcha!" trap -- is so exquisitely set up, it had me squealing "Awesome!" the minute Mahone whipped out a gun. And then it got even better when Michael informed General Von Baldy that he had, in fact, walked into Michael's trap. The general is a little nonplussed that Michael managed to get everyone else's cards (he knows not how) and Michael waltzes out with Scylla in his battered backpack.

Then Team Scylla camps out in General Von Baldy's office. He tempts them with offers of what they desire most in the world, but nobody's budging. General Von Baldy's like, "We're about to end this charade, and my goons will kill you all," except then Dr. Sara calls with the news that she's kidnapped Lisa Tabak. And -- get this! -- Lisa is General Von Baldy's daughter. No wonder she and Gretchen don't like each other! Anyway, General Von Baldy is all outraged that Team Scylla would dare to go after his loved ones, which is rich considering he's in a room with one guy whose kid he ordered killed, one guy whom he set up for murder, and that guy's brother.

Meanwhile, White and his hail-fellow-well-met barging in on "Cole Pfeiffer" ends badly. White notices the giant guns "Cole" has stashed under his desk, and that prompts Gretchen to take the entire office hostage. Trisha (who managed to escape from House of Feng more or less unscathed, more on that below) comes back from the office to this scene, attempts a rescue of her coworkers. However, Mr. White blows the rescue, carnage ensues, and Gretchen and T-Bag get away.

No sooner are they out of the building than Gretchen attempts to take out T-Bag. Since he has the best luck of anyone on this show, an in-hot-pursuit Trisha inadvertently saves him, then collars him. The two have a very moving scene in a car (once again, Robert Knepper makes this material better than it deserves to be), and then Don Self comes by and -- SHOCKER! -- he kills her and we learn that he's decided to go massively off the reservation. Self is now out there and planning to sell Scylla to the highest bidder.

I give Self props for pulling one over on everyone, but have to question his long-term thinking: he's just pissed off the four people in America who have a proven track record of kicking ass and taking names. Oooh, I can't wait to see what happens next!

Want more? The full recap starts right below!

This episode begins where the other one ends -- with Michael hanging out by the Scylla obelisk, just sort of checking it out all nice and slow. We cut to General Von Baldy and some of his security goons heading down to the Scylla chamber, which only makes me jumpy, so of course, Michael decides it's time to slow down and count each individual vent in the sides of the Scylla, or whatever. Aigh! Tension at the one-minute mark can't be good for anyone's resting heart rate.

Then the show cackles evilly and switches away before we see what happens next! We cut to GATE, where Gretchen and T-Bag are coiled with expectation, ready and waiting to kill Team Scylla and take the booty over to Fang. T-Bag asks if maybe they shouldn't be waiting closer to the Scylla chamber, and Gretchen condescends to tell him, "If you knew anything about tactics, you'd know that this is the high ground. Besides, we have silencers." I'm thinking that T-Bag actually knows plenty about tactics, given how well he's managed for himself in the past few seasons, but what do I know? I'm no flawlessly-lipsticked mercenary. Then again, if I were, I wouldn't leave my silencer-equipped guns casually resting below my desk.

We flash back to Michael wearily concluding that Scylla is not one card but six, then in the present, he pokes around one of the slots in the Scylla monolith. In the elevator, General Von Baldy directs his little henchmen to make sure Michael's not wired for explosives, then to kill him. We cut to Michael, and hear the ding of an elevator the same time he does, and then ...

And then it gets AWESOME because it turns out that Michael was dilly-dallying for a reason! And that reason was because he had planned for General Von Baldy to come down all along, and the minute the general and his goons are down, the other members of Team Scylla have guns to everyone's heads (note: this is when I actually cheered), and Linc cuddles up to General Von Baldy with his piece and orders, "Drop 'em. Or I blow his head clean off." We cut to Mahone, who is giving his designated goon a look that'll probably cause the goon to drop both his gun and the contents of his lower intestine. When the goon fails to respond, Mahone aims at Scylla and says, "You're going to want to put that down." Von Baldy sighs, "Lower your weapons." The goons do; Sucre restrains them. Linc walks Von Baldy over to Scylla. Because Von Baldy is still in denial over Team Scylla's chops, he drawls, "The best minds in the world designed the security system and you almost beat it. The frustration must be killing you. You blew it." Michael comes over and says, "Actually, there's only one missing piece of the puzzle and you just brought it to me." The general's all, "Come again what?" and Michael demands the general's Scylla card. Linc leans forward with his gun, and the general dismisses him with an eyeroll before sighing and handing over the card.

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2014-02-01
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