Episode Report Card Sobell: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT To Thine Own Self Be True
By Sobell | Season 4 | Episode 12 | Aired on 11.24.2008
Back at Team Scylla HQ, everyone's twiddling their thumbs, waiting for their promised tickets to freedom. To break the tedium, Linc walks over to Mahone and says, "Remember what I said to you the first day that we got here?" Mahone does: "You said when this was over, we were going to settle up." Linc says, "We're settled." Awww, LINCOLN FORGIVES. Another dramatic arc on this show laid to rest! Dr. Sara comes in and points out that it's been an hour, so could Michael please call Don Self and check on that ambulance. And ... and then, everyone's good mood evaporates as Michael gets a loud message telling him the number he had for Don Self has been disconnected.
Cut to Don Self, looking blissfully untroubled by calls from Michael Scofield. He tells Trisha, "You did really good on this one. You really held your own." Trisha's pleased by the compliment, and she completely misses how unhappy Don looks. Instead, she wants to gaze upon the wonder of Scylla one more time. Don looks shifty for a second, apologizes, and then, right as Trisha asks, "What are you talking about?" -- he shoots her. Holy Toledo, Don Self is officially a bad guy now! Who among us unspoiled people saw that coming? Do you suppose this was his plan all along, or did his head get turned by the possibility of earning a nine-figure payout? I have no idea -- I'm too boggled. Even T-Bag looks stunned by this development. And possibly worried for his own life, since he is handcuffed inside a car and Don Self is giving him a very calculating look.
Meanwhile, it's beginning to occur to Team Scylla that perhaps, they're hosed. When Michael opens the manila envelope and discovers that it contains blank pages -- something that he really should have checked when Don Self handed it over, come to think of it -- everyone just sort of goggles. Then, because this is TV, the only four-letter word Michael can mutter over and over again without costing FOX $15 million in fines is "Self, Self." And we cut to Lincoln's expression -- best described as LINCOLN WILL KILL DON SELF -- and back to Michael, who looks like he's already shifted from the getting-mad portion of events to the plans to get even.
Sadly, we do not cut to Don Self realizing that there are five people in America who have a track record of achieving the impossible when sufficiently motivated -- and he's just managed to piss every single one of them off. With luck, we'll see that next week, along with Don's realization that he's now target #1 for the One World Conspiracy. Oh please, oh please, oh please.