Episode Report Card Jessica: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Love Bites
By Jessica | Season 6 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.08.2003
Anyway. "I need you around. What do you say?" Oliver asks. "No, no," Joey sort of stutters in a really indecisive way. Oliver comments awkwardly that that wasn't the answer he was looking for. "[Oliver], you walked away," Joey stammers. "I came back," he tells her. And didn't they make some kind of I Will Always Love You, Let's Meet Up In Paris pact when he left? So, really, I don't think it's surprising that Oliver is back expecting her to be happy to see him. The last he saw her, they were all making out on Pacific Avenue and whatnot. "I moved on," Joey says, very uncomfortably. "Oh. Okay," Oliver says. "If that's how you feel. Okay, I understand, I do. I guess I'll be seeing you, Joey," he says, then scampers off. See, all of this unfortunate uncomfortableness could have been avoided if someone picked up the phone, or used this newfangled invention that I hear is all the rage with the kids called "email." Communication! It's the key to successful relationships, people! At any rate, Joey calls her apologies after Oliver and rests her head in her hands and mopes her way into the credits.
After all the ovary wailing, we open on Joey's massive dorm room at Worthington College For Girls With Daddy Issues. Harley is going through Joey's closet and making disparaging comments about her formalwear, which begs the question: why does Joey have so much formalwear? When I was nineteen, I had one formal, which I had worn to my senior prom. Anyway, Joey is perched on her bed reading, her hair in cute little plaits. She asks Harley to please "pick something and leave." Harley picks at a flowered number. "If you're going to be chaperoning my semiformal, you need to wear something moderately hip so I don't look like a freak associating with you," Harley exposits, and wonders if Joey has anything that's even remotely "older woman sexy." Harley, Joey's, like, nineteen. If she's "older woman sexy," I must be entering my "hot retiree" stage. Then Harley decides that she'd rather Joey not look too hot at the party, as to avoid attracting poor stupid Patrick. Joey rolls her eyes and swears to keep her "Mrs. Robinson paws off Patrick." Then she kicks Harley out so she can study.
Cut to Casa Grams. Jen rolls out of bed and examines her messy, horrible hair in the mirror. "I look ridiculous," she announces. Well, Jennifer, knowing is half the battle. Jen begins combing her mop with her fingers. Blandy, shirtless, sidles up next to her and they stare at each other in the mirror. Blandy assures her that she's "glowing," and they make out. It's like Eyes Wide Shut: The College Years. When they pull apart, Blandy tells Jen that the "Lindley women are something else." He explains that Grams broke his Uncle Bill's heart. "He can't even watch Wheel of Fortune because Vanna White reminds him of his devastation." This is amusing to me on several levels, the most prominent being the idea that Vanna White is now old enough to remind Uncle Bill of Grams. Jen shrugs that she had no idea Grams was "the black widow." Eventually, the two of them put some clothes on and then kiss some more. Well, I guess their sex problems are over. After some more making out, Blandy leaves. Jen calls after him that she'll see what she can find out about Grams.