Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: A- | 249 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Yeah, I Don't Do Teen Drama
By Cindy McLennan | Season 4 | Episode 5 | Aired on 2012.11.08
So, Damon gathers up a few of Ric's remaining weapons and then shows Elena a map. "It's our way in, courtesy of Alaric Saltzman's interest in the Mystic Falls Underground Railroad." Okay, while I appreciate the tip of the hat to Ric's role as historian, I do hope that someone on this show knows that the "Underground" part of "Underground Railroad," wasn't usually underground. There were some tunnels and hiding places, but underground in this case mostly means secret, not literally subterranean. I mean, I'll allow this usage, I just don't want it to mix people up. Look, I'm tired and cranky. Let's move on.
Elena says these are like the ones under the Lockwood cellar. Damon says, "Yep." The phone rings. It's Stefan. He's tuned his vamponic hearing toward the Grill, and can hear Matt and April in there, as well as Jeremy. Damon reminds Stefan the clock is ticking. Stefan: "You know, I could do without the color commentary," and hangs up.
Elena tells Damon she's going in through the tunnels. Damon says since Connor doesn't know she's a vamp, it's better to keep it that way. Elena suggests offering herself as a trade for the hostages. Damon: "No! Best case scenario is, now you're a hostage. Worst case scenario -- he figures you out, kills you on the spot." Elena reminds Damon that Alaric trained her and she's been practicing with Stefan. Oh, honey, you can't even feed off a Roofie Rapist without feeling guilty, and now you're ready to go up against Boy-Buffy? I don't think so.
Damon agrees with me. Elena's not ready to take on a professional killer. He zoops to the bed, grabs one of Ric's stake guns or something and points it at Elena. "Bang. You're dead. Now what?" Elena rushes at Damon, disarms him, slams him on the bed and straddles him. Holding the gun to his chest she says, "Head shot's no good. It has to be the heart. So now you're dead." Damon laughs. "For someone who doesn't want to be like me, you sure are good at it." Elena says Jeremy is the only thing holding her together right now. She can't let anything happen to him. Damon promises her they'll get him out. I promise you both that if Stefan walks in and sees Elena straddling you like that, Damon, you'll both be dead.