Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: A- | 249 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Yeah, I Don't Do Teen Drama
By Cindy McLennan | Season 4 | Episode 5 | Aired on 2012.11.08
Stefan's journaling is interrupted by a text from Klaus which reads, "We have a problem." We cut to Stefan talking on the phone, asking how Connor escaped. We cut to Klaus in Italy. This isn't some dead-of-night grave robbing operation he's running here. It's a full-scale archaeological dig, with tenting, lights, the whole shebang. Klaus points out that since Connor took Nate Hybrid's head, he must be after more werewolf venom. Stefan figures that means the hunter will stay in town to kill as many vampires as he can. Klaus exposits that since he keeps his healing blood in his person, and his person is in Italy, the Fellowship of the Falls is screwed if any of them gets poisoned with the toxin. There's more exposition, but you guys are watching every week. I hate to belabor this stuff, even if the show doesn't. Klaus's final orders are to keep the secret and keep Connor alive. Keep it secret. Keep it safe. But Gandalf, he's not. Klaus threatens to throw the hunter's sword in the sea, if Stefan utters a word about the cure to anyone. Stefan, he's totally bluffing. Klaus is even more motivated than you are -- to restore Elena's humanity. Stop. Think.
Grill. As Matt sets up the dining room, he leaves a snarly voice message for Jeremy about being late. April wanders in, so Matt tells her they don't open until 11:00 AM. She's just babbling about how she's not stalking Matt at all, at all, at all, and how she's looking for Rebecca. When Matt laughs off April's suggestion that he and Rebecca are an item, she says she's just worried, because Rebecca promised to help her find out about the ranch explosion, but then disappeared. Fun fact. I typed raunch explosion back there. This show has already been so disgusting this season, I shudder to think what that might involve. Anyhow, Connor manhandles Jeremy into the dining room and tells April that's the least of her problems. Being not adorable enough is not one of her problems, I tell you what. I love this kid.
Gilbert Gables. Damon shows up at Elena's bedroom door because he's forward like that. He's looking for Stefan, who isn't answering his phone. Damon asks to use Elena's phone in case Stefan is dodging his calls because of their hot, sweaty dance at the Whitmore frat. That's Damon and Elena's hot sweaty dance. To date, we haven't seen a hot sweaty Stefan/Damon dance. Something has to be left for the fic writers. Anyhow, Damon is amused when he realizes Elena didn't spill her guts about it to Stefan. She denies she's in a shame spiral, but Damon says, "Oh, you so are. Newbie vampire remorse? It's worse than a hangover." When the call goes right to Stefan's voicemail, Damon decides either Stefan is dodging both of them, or something's wrong. Damon's sanguine discussion of newbie remorse makes me wish that his turn to teach Elena how to be a vampire had started out a little more slowly and gone a different way. Sigh.