Episode Report Card Owen: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Pardon My Past
By Owen | Season 2 | Episode 14 | Aired on 02.16.2000
Cut to the menfolk. Dan is quizzing Leo on his "favorite ballplayer." Leo answers, "Joe DiMaggio." Dan tells him that he meant Leo's favorite ballplayer from childhood. Leo reiterates his choice of DiMaggio, then covers his gaffe by explaining that his "grandfather's favorite" became his favorite. Dan believes that Leo doesn't like talking about his past much. Leo doesn't find it very interesting. Dan quizzes Leo about his stint in the army. When did Leo get discharged? Piper walks up to the guys, and Dan gloms onto her (natch). She wonders if they've been talking about her much. Dan: "Not at all." Piper gives Leo the stink-eye. Dan continues his interrogation about Leo's army experience. Piper interrupts them to urge everyone to "look at the time."
Cut to Phoebe upstairs, studying. She's sitting cross-legged on her bed, with her kimono bed jacket open. She hears "Party's over!" from downstairs, and gripes, "Finally." She takes some chopsticks off of her head to let her hair down, and leans over her flashcards for a primo cleavage shot. Um, what's up with the Far Eastern-themed study outfit you're half-wearing, Phoebe? Become a real college student and graduate to sweat pants and an old t-shirt.
Halliwell Manor. Outside. Prue, walking bow-legged in her heels and Ann-Margarock dress, escorts some people down the walkway towards their cars.
Phoebe's room. She hears music and party chatter start up again. Pheebs puts down her highlighter and gets her bitch on. She walks downstairs, whining that she "asked you guys to keep it down." She checks out the foyer and the parlor, but they're empty. She can still hear Dixieland jazz and party chatter, though. Suddenly she's thrown against a wall by an invisible force. Her kimono top is thrust open, revealing her lavender Vickie's Secret bra, taut abs and pierced navel. We cut to an overhead shot for maximum bosom exposure. Phoebe gasps for air. Her bra strap is pushed down off her shoulder, and her boxers are forced up her thigh. Phoebe closes her eyes and slides down the wall to the floor. A lamp falls and breaks, alerting the hard Ps to come inside to investigate. Prue and Piper, with Dan in tow, run to Phoebe's aid. She comes to. Is she all right? Phoebe "thinks so." Piper asks her what's the big. Phoebe doesn't know, but sure wants to find out.
Congratulations to Brian Krause for finally figuring out with whom he had to sleep to get his face on the opening credits. Cheers!
So in this new movie, Madonna and Rupert Everett mate, and she gives birth to a stillborn British accent through her nasal passages.