Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 3 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT West Nile Is Not Just A Virus In Egypt
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.06.2013
Wilkes: "I have a fifteen-year-old daughter myself. Why, just the other day she turned her beautiful face to me and said, 'Daddy, when I grow up I want to outsource all of my datacenter and customer service needs to the third world. That'll be just the thing to help grow our American economy!' Then she set up a tax shelter for her birthday money, because taxes are for poor people."
Everybody: (Nods sagely, envisioning the day that Rafiki the Priest-Monkey will hold Wilkes Ingersoll's daughter up under the sun, far above the savannah, and they can pledge their allegiance and personal agency to a whole new generation of fuckfaces.)
Alicia: "Oh my God. Look, here's a letter your VP just kicked upstairs, detailing exactly how you are at fault here and were warned well ahead of time."
Wilkes: "Really? I have to go."
Then he vanishes. His posse vanishes. Just like that. Just a row of cushy faux-leather nailhead-trimmed Business Office chairs, spinning in their wake.
Alicia: "But what? Uh, the agreement was pretty specific. Three hours. I flew to Minnesota. I can't get a cell phone signal. Everything is quiet. I'm sitting in a room with a fax machine like it's goddamn 1860 in here. Why are you like this?"
Louis: "Who are we to judge? It was clearly an emergency. He'll be back at two."
Alicia: "I don't often get premonitions, but it seems to me almost undoubtedly that we will be spending this entire episode in this very Business Center, as the decades-old cigarette smoke smell slowly invades first my clothing, and then my soul."
Louis: "For a second I thought you were gonna hit me!"
Alicia: "For a second, little buddy, so did I."
GOLD & ASSOC
That super-creepy DNC guy Frank is here. That's never good. He seems so jolly and then instantly so very sociopathic. If only he brought presents when he came. Like, adorable tiny presents. Who are geniuses. Maybe like not-entirely neurotypical geniuses. I'm very into short, super detail-oriented guys right now. If there's one thing I learned this fall it's that my grandma was totally right when she said, "God never closes a David Petraeus without opening a Nate Silver." You know what I mean? It was really mysterious until 2012, but now it's like, "Wow. I totally get it, Grandma. Your wisdom."
Eli: "Maddie's polling is up, so what? We're still beating her above the margin of error."
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