Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | 1 USERS: D YOU GRADE IT Indian Summer
By Wing Chun | Season 3 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.26.1999
Night falls on Capeside. In the park, Henry spreads out a blanket on the ground and checks the palm of his hand where he's written a crib sheet for his impending encounter with Jen, muttering, "Moonlight. Tell her how nice she looks. 'What a beautiful spot this is!' Don't puke. Don't puke. Don't puke." As he repeats the last bit a few more times, Jen walks up behind him and asks if he's okay. He moans inarticulately, so she tells him to "gulp once for 'yes,' twice for 'no.'" He swallows hard, which she interprets as "yes," and then asks what's on his hand. He says it's nothing, and then says she's awesome: "You look awesome, you smell awesome -- everything about you is awesome. I just wanted you to know that." Good-naturedly, Jen says, "Good to know," and asks what he's doing there. He says he's just hanging out, "same thing you are." She says that she's actually waiting for Jack. Henry tells her that Jack couldn't be there, because he had other plans. Jen's face falls. Henry adds that Jack sent him instead. Jen says she thinks she knows where this is going, and tells him to come out with it. Henry admits that Jack thought if they were both there, it would be sort of like a date. Jen says, "Look, Henry, I know you're new at this, being all of -- what, fourteen?" Sadly, Henry says, "Fifteen." Jen says, "Okay, fifteen. Dating is a consensual activity that usually involves some sort of pre-arrangement. Next time, don't skip the part where you ask me." She stomps off with all the grace of a young Edie McClurg. Jen, I see where you're coming from, but don't bite the poor frosh's head off -- he doesn't know what he's doing.
Elsewhere, Skeeve skanks along the dock while Dawson and Pacey follow at a discreet distance appropriate to the stalkers they've become. Skeeve gets on a boat and turns on a light. Through a curtain, they watch her change clothes, as does the audience, for far longer than is really necessary. She emerges in a totally butt pink terry-cloth tube dress, and skanks back off the way she came. Pacey follows her, and Dawson sneaks onto the boat Skeeve just vacated, where he finds some empty candy cartons, some clothes, and, tucked into a hardcover book, a snapshot of a woman with long, blonde hair. Before he -- or we -- can really study it, he hears, "Freeze -- you're under arrest," and slowly tucks the picture in his pocket. Of course, it's Deputy Doug, holding a gun on Dawson. You know he's got a clear shot; getting Dawson would be like hitting the broad side of a barn. A barn with really bad hair.
Hey, J. Crew guy. Shell out for some damn wrapping paper. No one wants a present that's wrapped in something that came so close to your ass.