Episode Report Card Owen: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Give Me A Sign
By Owen | Season 2 | Episode 15 | Aired on 02.23.2000
Unconsummated Condo. Bane asks Prue once again why she's sticking around. Prue: "You just took off your pants and I got to see your toned and cut quadriceps, glutes and calves . . ." Or rather, it's because she "believes" him. Bane thanks her for "believing in" him. Hey, I think we should drink now anyway -- "believing in yourself" talk is close enough. Sip. Sip. Prue thinks maybe he's stopped "believing in" himself. Sip. Bane blathers that he wasn't always a criminal "like this;" he "had dreams [sip] once. Big dreams [sip]." Prue thinks it's "not too late to change." Bane tells her it's too late for him, but not for her. She should "go, so [she] can have [her] dreams [sip]." Prue: "Easier said than done." She prattles that her "dreams [sip] may be just that -- dreams [sip]." Bane doesn't believe (sip) that. They kiss. Bane winces. Did his tongue get caught between Shannen's tombstone caps? Nope, she touched his -- ahem -- wound. Prue is "sorry." Bane is "not." They mack some more.
Mausoleum. Wetvac touches Lackey's head and the ray gun attack at the condo is played back in the same shots we saw earlier. Hello, it's called POV, producers -- look into it. Wetvac says something threatening and menacing to try to entice a few of us to come back and watch the conclusion of this ep after we channel-surf during the commercials.
The last time Roman Polanski lensed his untalented bovine French bride Emmanuelle Seigner, the result was Bitter Moon -- for my money, the only flick to seriously challenge Showgirls as the definitive camp hoot of the '90s. Needless to say, I'll be catching The Ninth Gate. If you hear me snickering in the fifth row from the front of the theater, don't you dare shush me.
Consummated Condo. The camera pans over Bane and Prue's discarded clothes on the floor. How original. I haven't seen that post-coital shot on television in the last five hours. Bane wakes up with his nether regions covered by a painter's drop cloth and notices that Prue isn't next to him. I guess they rutted on the floor like dogs. Cut to Prue looking out the window in her t-shirt and Bane's black boxers. He wraps the sheet around his middle and approaches her. She says, "The view is amazing," although I'm sure everything is currently amazing to her -- she finally got laid after nine months of celibacy. Besides, which view is better, the blue screen they have yet to super-impose the ocean upon, or the muscled torso of man-candy off to her right? Bane worries that Prue "might have left." Prue "just couldn't find all of [her] clothes." Way to play coy, honey -- as if the camera hadn't already shown us all of your clothes in plain view on the floor of this unfinished, unfurnished room. She has decided to help this known criminal defeat the demon Wetvac, since she now has five fluid ounces of endorphins coursing through her brain. But he has to promise to turn himself back in to the police afterwards. Bane suggests that they just run off together. Prue seriously considers this, but thinks that Bane is suddenly striking her as "a dreamer [sip]." They kiss.