Episode Report Card Pamie: B+ | 105 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Control Your Woman
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 12 | Aired on 2005.1.001
Lorelai goes into the other room to take her call from Rory. Wouldn't you think by now Lorelai's phone would ring "Sexual Healing" or something when it's Rory? Presumptuous Rory asks if Lorelai will cover her this Friday, since she may have a "thing" she needs to do. You know Rory's not ready to be sexually active, when she still calls a blowjob a "thing" to "do." Lorelai's just dirty enough to figure out it's a "man thing" (See? DIRTY!), and Rory whines that she doesn't want to jinx it, since it's not a definite yet. Michel finds Lorelai to inform her that there might be another sexual harassment suit filed against him, since he just asked Lars if he was "seeing anybody special." Michel heads out the door (presumably to find that horse), and Kirk runs after to retrieve him for Lorelai, creating a whole new job for himself: French Wrangler.
The band. Everybody's grumpy and they're not getting a song right. Brian tells mfTL that his E string is flat. MfTL says that makes it more rock and roll. MfTL counts down in German, much to Sebastian Bach's annoyance. But I'm used to mfTL counting in German, as he used to be in the Neu Tickles. They launch into a Pixies song that's quickly interrupted by knocking on the front door. "Who the hell is that?" mfTL asks into the microphone. "I hope it's not my girlfriend's husband," Brian quips. "Aw, that's fresh!" mfTL laughs into the mic. Hee. It's MamaLane at the door. Lane squares her shoulders and gets ready to stand her ground against her mother. MamaLane mentions the E string. MamaLane tells Lane she has to come to the Lunar New Year party or she'll be humiliating her mother. Lane reminds her mother that she recently yelled at mfTL at a newsstand, which is certainly humiliation. "That is in the past," MamaLane says. Lane says she'll only come to the party if she can bring her boyfriend. MamaLane says she only has enough chairs for those invited. Lane reminds her mother that she, in fact, sells chairs for a living, and probably has enough. MamaLane says that if "Boy" comes, then she will invite the Parks, whom Lane hates. MamaLane: "You shouldn't hate the Parks." Lane: "You hate the Parks! They're mean!" MamaLane: "I get to hate the Parks." Lane says she's going to bring her entire band, then. MamaLane likes that -- since it will look less like Lane has a boyfriend, I bet. MamaLane leaves. The band's all, "Thanks, Lane. Awesome." (The Sounds: Living In America. ["ooh. Great single, disappointing album." -- Wing Chun])