Episode Report Card Cate: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I Love Lucy
By Cate | Season 7 | Episode 15 | Aired on 02.09.2003
Next, Lucy runs into Simon, who's walking around upstairs with a toothbrush sticking out of his mouth. If I actually saw someone doing that in real life, I'd probably tell him to be careful since, if he fell, that toothbrush might get jammed into his brain. Since this is Simon, I won't bother. He says he's feeling ill and won't be going out with Cecilia on Valentine's Day. Not going out on VD! Just awful. Even if he hadn't been feeling ill before, he probably is now, since he's listening to Lucy whine about how she's not engaged yet. She does add some heartfelt sympathy, though, for the fact that Simon won't be spending this holiest of holidays with his girlfriend. Simon tells us he will be talking to Asslee on the phone. They won't be having phone sex, of course, but they do plan to spend the time discussing what they love about each other. I sincerely doubt that that will take all night, as Simon seems to feel it will. Since Lucy's obviously fishing for sympathy, Simon gives it to her -- probably to make her go away.
Ruthie's watching the twins -- watching them jump on the bed, that is. If I actually saw kids jumping on the bed in real life, I'd probably tell them to stop because they could crack their heads open. But since these are the twins, I won't bother. Thing One wails something about how Ruthie made them birthday hats. What a crappy gift -- but not much worse than Lucy's gift, which is to make the twins spend the day with her at the zoo. She even lets them choose the day. Why not? It's not like she ever goes to school or has a job or anything. With the twins' birthday nicely glossed over, now it's back to the Lucy and Kevin bullshit. Ruthie wants to see the dress that Kevin bought Lucy. Naturally, she's already peeked in the box. Lucy pulls out the dress and acts surprised that it's her size. Of course it is! Determining her size must be a piece of cake for a cyborg. After all, doesn't Kevin have that computer readout stuff going on in front of his "eyes"? I don't know whether to be impressed that the T-1000 bought Lucy an expensive dress she really wanted, or creeped out because he's telling her what to wear on their date. I will feel sorry for him, though, if he's going to have to listen to Lucy whine all evening about not being engaged. Maybe she'll get it all out of her system now, but I doubt it. And speaking of whining, she's doing it again. I guess the person I really should be feeling sorry for is myself. Or Peter, since Ruthie's planning to bring the twins over to his house to celebrate VD.