Episode Report Card Potes: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Goddesses and Monsters
By Potes | Season 12 | Episode 1 | Aired on 03.04.2009
Eventually Jay intervenes and asks them why they're fighting. Angelea replies, "This bitch is trying to try me," and Jay wonders why she can't just turn a blind eye. It's because she has AN EYE PROBLEM, JAY. God, how could he be so insensitive? In any case, it's Angelea's turn to do her photo shoot, and she's Venus, the Goddess of Love. She interviews that she needs to learn to pick and choose her battles, because it's not professional to insult someone's ugly-ass corns in front of a photographer. Angelea is having a hard time portraying love, and Jay wonders if the fight with Sandra brought her down a little. She interviews that it didn't, but she's crying all the while, so I am suspect. She finishes her shoot with a nice serene look, then interviews that Sandra knows she's competition, which is why Sandra is trying to pull her buttons. Do you think she's trying to push a fast one on us? Jay announces that he, Miss J. and Tyra are going to look through the photos and determine the final 13. Angelea is still upset. She interviews that she doesn't want people to think that she's just some ghetto-ass, ghettofied, no-class bitch who don't care. I am only thinking three-quarters of those things. Meanwhile, Sandra is completely nonplussed. Angelea weeps about how bad she wants this as we head to commercial, and I am sad for her that there's no way she's going to pass the psych test.
Meanwhile, check this out! For Cycle 13, Tyra and Co. are bringing high fashion to a new height and looking for girls who are 5'7" and under. Remember how for a minute everyone was totally excited about that rumor that there would be a plus-sized season? Well, shorties are the new fatties. Think about it!
Tyra and the Jays deliberate. Aminat is tall, and Miss J. loves tall girls. Jay wasn't sure about her at first, but loved that she embodied "pride" so well. Despite the fact that she was supposed to embody strength? He thinks she's going to bring intelligence to set. Well, at least someone will. Allison is the type of girl that Tyra likes to use to educate the public about the fact that being a model is not just about being pretty, it's about being odd. Thanks, Tyra, the public was so dumb before you came along. I can feel my brain doubling itself with every hour I spend writing this recap. Jay likes Allison, too, "if she has the energy." Give her deliveries of fresh drag queen blood twice a week and she'll do just fine. Angelea had a big old girl fight that resulted in a stank photo. Jay says that Tyra doesn't like girlfights. However, Miss J. does, and says this is why he loves Angelea -- she fights for her position. Isabella is cute, and could sell Model Fierce Corn Flakes. Celia is potentially crazy, but also potentially smart. And she can twirl really well. Fo has a beautiful face, and her energy might make up for the fact that she's short. Jessica is the prettiest girl in the bunch... that she runs around with. Her skin is as stunning as Jay's when it is freshly oranged.
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