Episode Report Card Megyn: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Return of the Jab-eye
By Megyn | Season 4 | Episode 9 | Aired on 01.06.2001
Cut to the unmistakable strains of smooth jazz as the man himself enters Leo's office. He cats into the room in a bad-ass huff. "What the fuck is going on? I get a call asking me if I'm willing to be interviewed by Jack fucking Eldridge? Leo's like, "Well they found out what went on when you were in charge…they heard about the tapes." Querns: "Fuck!" He sucks up with all his might: "When you asked me to resign you said no one would ever know, so no one would get hurt!" Leo's response: "Refuse to do the interview, that's what I did." Querns considers this tidbit: "Fine, where are the tapes?" Glynn tells him they're in a safe place, to which Querns snarls at him for keeping the damn things in the first place: "Destroy them, destroy the muthafuckin' tapes, NOW!" And he swoops out of the room. Then we see Glynn over a metal-grinder thing, destroying said tapes next to a bag of potatoes. Then he trudges to the men's room, because all that Watergate stuff can make a man's bladder seek release. Now, who do you think is in there but Jack Eldridge. Eldridge greets him: "Heard you cancelled the interview, may I ask why? Between two guys holding their dicks?" (You can see why I do not encourage my mom to read my recaps, can't you?) Glynn gives a bullshit answer, which Eldridge calls him on. He then asks Leo how many years he's run Oz. Answer? Too many. Eldridge continues, "Yet, it would bother you to leave, to be forced out because some mishandling of the job was exposed on TV." Well, duh! Leo zips up and turns to Jack. I feel a deep answer coming. "I've spent my life punishing people. Lives have been lost and I wonder if I could have stopped the carnage." Jack: "Simon Adebisi…could you have prevented his death?" Leo washes his hands and turns to Jack: "Yes. Balls-out truth, I should be fired, but I'm afraid what they would bring in to replace me would be worse. Terrible thing to reach this point and realize your life has been a sham." Jack does his best Highway to Heaven with, "Except for a man whose job was meant to punish others, you also must be punishing yourself even more." Leo: "Off the record?" "Yes." "No comment." Awww. Warm fuzzy, people! Hard-core reporter has a heart! Details at eleven!
Jack goes to tell Ally that Adebisi story is a dead end and she won't be getting the Pulitzer. Lisa's all about the story and gets pissed. He's firm and stands his ground with, "Leo Glynn isn't perfect, but he's not incompetent." She still wants to expose him for the fuck-up she believes him to be. He just tells her to rest up. Big day tomorrow. She yells after him that letting the story go is a huge mistake. He acknowledges this. Actually, he flem flahs about newsmen having a heart blah blah beautiful-moment-in-men's-room-cakes.