Episode Report Card Pamie: A- | 97 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT How To Lose A Mom In Ten Days
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 17 | Aired on 2005.03.08
In the...study/book/library/sitting/waiting/Digger room. Lorelai asks where all of their books have gone. There are plenty of books in the shelves, so she must mean a specific Readers Digest kind of special leather-bound collection. Sookie suggests that the guests have been swiping them. Oh, no, Sookie. Are you stealing books to escape motherhood, too? You are crying out for help, girl. It's because Lorelai started making you wear that uniform, isn't it? I understand. Lorelai isn't happy to see that her books have been replaced with Clifford the Big Red Dog and five copies of He's Just Not That Into You. Sookie: "We've been Airplane Booked." Lorelai calls some guy named Eddie, hands him the five self-helps and one kiddie book, and tells him to get rid of them. Where's he supposed to take them? Lorelai says she'll raid Rory's books tonight to refill the shelves. Poor Rory's gonna be livid when she comes home to find her vandalized Howl has been stolen.
Michel wanders into the room holding two big shopping bags, wearing sunglasses and a green blazer over a t-shirt. "There he is!" he smiles. "Who missed Michel?" Lorelai calls it a trick question. Sookie asks how he enjoyed California. Michel: "Oh, you know. It is insanity." Hee. I love Michel. He asks, "What is different about me?" Sookie guesses it’s the sunglasses he's wearing indoors. Michel corrects her, informing her that he's wearing "eyewear," and that everyone in Los Angeles wears pairs and pairs of eyewear. Actually, we're wearing sunglasses. And it's because the sun is crazy bright out here. The air is so filthy that the sun bounces off all the little smog particles in the air and it hurts to have your eyes open because the air is filled with crap and the sun is glinting off every single molecule around you and if you don’t wear sunglasses and take Claritin on the hour you can't even open your puffy, watery eyes. HOL-lee-wood! Dun-nuh-nuh-NA-NA-NA-NA HOL-lee-wood! And did I mention the rain? We're weather babies. Michel's t-shirt features a picture of a palm tree, and it says "Palm Tree" under it. God, that's hysterical. Michel says he belongs in Los Angeles, where everybody is thin and gorgeous. You mean like Stars Hollow? Hmm. Michel must not have gone to the Farmer's Market. Michel then gives a big-ol' shout-out to my old Coffee Bean, saying, "There's this place on Sunset Boulevard? A Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf? Everybody there talks exactly like me!" That is hilarious and pretty much true, except that everybody there is Persian, and smokes really stinky cigars. It's the most celebrity-spotting Coffee Bean next to the one on Beverly and Robertson. Michel also got some Botox from Dr. Woo. "She's a genius; everyone goes there." He also got some veneers from Nick Lachey's dentist. All Michel needs is a dog in a bag and he's good to go. Part of me wonders if this is what Al Lowe, Omar G, and AB Chao think I'm like since I moved from Texas.