Episode Report Card Omar G: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT House of Buggin'
By Omar G | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 10.22.2001
Full moon. Bo Duke is in the barn, putting huge metal blades on some farm implement. Why is he always handling huge and dangerous-looking blades? Cheekbones offers Bo Duke a hand. "That's the best idea I've heard all night!" Bo cheeses. As he's about to climb down the stairs to help, 'Bones hears a weird chittering sound. He turns, and suddenly, Bug Boy is upon him! He leaps onto Cheekbones in his all-black fly threads (see, I work references in, too!), and is thrown back when 'Bones grabs him and tosses him back. Bo Duke hears the commotion and comes upstairs. "Someone in the rafters," Cheekbones explains. Instead of looking up, Bo Duke just looks to the left, ineffectually. They both grab flashlights from thin air and start pointing them around. Cheekbones's flashlight is huge! Don't go getting envious, now, Bo. Bo moves his smaller flashlight around and comes upon Bug Boy with his buggy eyes and scary buggy pallor. Bug Boy leaps onto Bo and knocks him through the wood railing. Bo falls off the upper level of the barn. "Dad!" Cheekbones yells, and now we're in bullet-time slow motion, just like in my favorite computer game, Max Payne. 'Bones leaps over wood planks, hops to the lower level -- still carrying his gargantuan flashlight -- then zips over to where Bo is still falling. He positions himself under Bo as Dad lands all over him. Couldn't he just catch Bo in his arms? Instead, Bo lands right on top of Cheekbones, ass to 'Bones's front, and they stay that way for at least an eternity. Bo wiggles around, making grimacing faces while Cheekbones still holds the huge flashlight. Bo finally gets up with a mighty grunt and a look of regret. They must have landed on top of the huge blades, because the blades are all bent now, from 'Bones's sturdy, supple back. "What just happened?" Bo asks. Cheekbones flashes his mighty, long flashlight. We go to commercial.
We're still in the barn. Mama Kent has joined us, and she's just there to look at her men unbelievingly, and to ask questions. Bo is explaining that it was as if this Bug Guy.... "Wasn't entirely human?" Cheekbones finishes. He says he thinks it was Greg Arkin. "Well, that's a name I haven't heard in a long time," Mama Kent tells him. She reminds Cheekbones that he and Greg used to play together in grade school. "Why would he want to hurt you?" Bo asks. 'Bones doesn't know. Mama Kent gets one of this week's cheesier lines. She says Bug Boy's mother kept him on a short leash, but Mama Kent "can't believe he'd hurt a fly!" I moan, loudly, profusely. "Kids just don't leap off the ceiling and attack people," Bo Duke says, wisely. Okay, that's the second stupid-ass line just like that in two consecutive weeks! Last week it was "Babies just don't fall out of the sky!" I've got one for you, Bo: "Has-been actors don't just appear on The WB and get their career back!" Cheekbones shines his flashlight up and sees a bunch of slimy green footsteps on the rafter. "I dunno," Bo Duke says. "Seems kinda out there." Mama Kent soundly tells him, "This from the man who's been hiding a spaceship in his storm cellar for the last twelve years." Touché. Bo just stands there lookin' dumb until he finally gives a subtle, almost imperceptible head nod.