Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: A- | 7 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT Freaks and Geeks
By Cindy McLennan | Season 2 | Episode 18 | Aired on 03.24.2013
August trips as he runs down the stairs and out into the street. Maybe August's brain is already turning to wood because if I handed over ten grand, stolen or not, for a cure, I'd take it in front of the guy who just took my (victim's) money. That's not in the script though -- instead, Tamara is, and she's waiting to catch her thief/pawn. It doesn't take her long. Because of his wooden leg, August eventually trips and falls. The potion flies high in the air. Tamara picks it up, then looks down at August who is yelling and writhing in pain and says, "Whatever it is you have, you deserve your fate." That would be true enough, had she not set up August from the beginning. Right now, I can't decide who is worse. I do have an awfully hard time feeling any pity for August as he lies there and sobs. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Present. Trailer. Tamara mocks August's decor then adds, "Then again, I guess a man made of wood doesn't require much." August is surprised that she is a believer, and asks her why she's in Storybrooke, and how that's even possible. At any rate, she wants him to do something for her. She says her request is simple, but come on, August, those are the requests that always turn out tricksy and false. August wants to know if Tamara followed him, and if she's "like him." She says she's not magical, but rather quite human. Avoiding the rest of her question, she reminds him that while her cancer was a death sentence, she's still living and breathing. August takes this as proof that The Dragon's potion worked. Tamara says she still has some of the cure left. It's in her NYC apartment. August can go and get it, provided she leaves Storybrooke now, and never returns.
Okay, maybe some of August's brain hasn't yet turned to wood, as he puts two and two together. "Neal. You're the fiancée. Are you and Neal here for the magic? Are you two trying to take the magic from Storybrooke?" Tamara sighs and rises. "Neal has nothing to do with any of this, okay. He knows as much as you do. Actually, now you know a lot more, so do we have a deal?" August says he can't take her up on her offer without knowing what she's doing in Storybrooke. Tamara says, "Sure you can. And you will. You're the same man I left in a Hong Kong gutter. A man willing to do anything to save himself. And that's what I'm offering, August." She dangles her keys above his head and adds, "Salvation." We cut to...
Granny's Boarding House. Gregor Mendel lets himself into his room and finds Regina there, waiting for him. He hangs up his phone, and pretends he thinks she's a chamber maid. Regina's not playing his reindeer games. She turns to face him and tells him she realizes why he seems so familiar. She knows he's Owen and pulls out the red and green gimp lanyard to prove it. "I kept this all these years, as a reminder of our time together. You were just a boy when you gave this to me. Now look at you. All grown up." She reaches out to caress his cheek. "No wonder I didn't recognize you." Gregowen (oh, I don't like that, I'm just going to call him Greg, or Owen, as the mood strikes) shrinks from her touch and says she looks exactly the same. Regina says, "Monthly juice cleanse. It does wonders for the skin." Forget The Dragon's potion. You could market that, Regina, and be Queen of the Whole Damned World -- you know... if you weren't lying. But right, your lips are moving and sound is coming out, so of course you are.