Episode Report Card Cate: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Prodigal
By Cate | Season 6 | Episode 7 | Aired on 11.11.2001
They go down to the kitchen, where Simon is washing dishes. They're just starting to bitch about Mary when the CamRents walk in. Annie grabs a dish from Ruthie's hands, informing her that the contents are for Mary. Lucy sarcastically says, "Oh, big surprise," but SuperMom doesn't even notice because she's too busy lovingly patting the plastic wrap back onto Mary's food. RevCam asks where Mary is, and Annie informs them that she's upstairs taking a bubble bath. The kids all look at her in dismay. Finally she picks up on it, and says, "What? I'm just glad my daughter's home." This is met with a deafening silence that tells her she's the only one who feels that way. Simon calls her on the favoritism, to which Annie responds by saying that she would welcome any of her other kids home in the same way. Lucy starts to point out that she never got the welcome wagon treatment, but instead she shuts up. For once, I wish she'd gone on. RevCam picks up the slack, though he sends the kids out of the room first.
He tells SuperMom that the kids are feeling like the prodigal son's brother right now, adding, "Mary may be returning home, but she's confessed nothing, and I don't think she's learned very much." Go, RevCam! He points out that Mary still seems irresponsible, and that her siblings are probably expecting an apology for her actions last year. Annie defends her vile daughter and suggests that what RevCam is really after is a confession from Mary. She tosses around some crap about loving Richard Nixon, based on something Eric said in a sermon about God loving us, despite our actions. It's all very bizarre, and it doesn't altogether make sense.
As Annie stalks off, Dopey comes into the CamKitchen. He and RevCam hold a theological debate over whether the prodigal son parable is about acceptance or forgiveness. It doesn't take Dopey very long to get lost. He said he must have missed that part of RevCam's lecture while he was opening a pack of Lifesavers. He figures out that the father in the parable represents Annie, and that RevCam is playing the part of the older brother. This makes Eric all defensive, as he points out that all the other kids feel the same way. Dopey vows to stay out of it -- until RevCam informs him that Mary will get to live in the Garage Treehouse. Upon hearing this news, Dopey becomes extremely agitated and runs off.
Up in the CamBoudoir, Annie is setting up an air mattress for Mary to sleep on. Ew, that's kind of creepy. Can't she just sleep in one of the millions of non-bedroom rooms in the CamPound? Just because there's no bed in a room doesn't mean you can't sleep in it. RevCam doesn't look pleased, but he agrees, adding that this will give the three of them "a chance to talk." He tells Mary that he telephoned Wilson in order to pry into her business, which pisses her off considerably. She accuses him of wanting to hear the news from Wilson because he doesn't trust her. Why should he? She's still an irresponsible moron. What happened to her firefighter training? Her work at the homeless shelter? Her classes? Or even the courtesy of informing her grandparents that she is moving out? Mary grabs her air mattress and starts to leave, but Annie stops her. She hands the air mattress to Eric, and a scuffle ensues. Man, if I were Eric, I'd have divorced this harpy ages ago. But Eric just takes it.