Episode Report Card Pamie: B- | 16 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Jess Is Dumb
By Pamie | Season 2 | Episode 19 | Aired on 2002.04.30
Even later. It appears that Rory and Jess have eaten a pie together. Instead of studying, Jess has taken to writing down Clash lyrics and making Rory guess the song. Leave, Rory. You aren't getting paid to babysit. In fact, you're not getting paid at all, as far as we can tell, so either neck with the boy or go home. Rory asks why Jess agreed to be tutored. Jess says that Luke said he had to. Rory says that Jess doesn't do what anybody ever tells him to. Jess asks if she'd like to get out of there. He's tired of studying. Rory says he hasn't done any studying yet. She says that all he's done is perform some magic tricks, make coffee, and explain how Coldplay could be considered an alternative band. I don't buy for a second that Jess would believe that, anyway. Jess sees Rory's car and asks if they can get some ice cream. He says that if they go out for ice cream, he'll study when they get back. Rory says there's ice cream there at the diner. Jess says they don't have any cones, and that cones are the most important part of the ice cream. Rory agrees, flirtatiously. She gives him the keys and says she'll read Othello to him as he drives. Rory has never been dumber in her life.
Did they drive to Bridgeport to get ice cream? Jess is driving the car Dean gave Rory as he tells Rory to admit that ice cream is better in cones. I wish he's stop saying "cones" like that. "Connnnnes." Jess never looks at the road and take his hands off the wheel to eat his ice cream. He tells Rory to take the wheel, because his ice cream is dripping. Rory freaks out and holds the wheel, but nobody looks at the road even once. Although we saw the car driving in Stars Hollow proper, through the back windshield we can see that they're driving on some kind of highway now. And through the side window, it appears they're driving through Compton. Jess takes the wheel back, but never looks at the road as the two of them flirt and flirt and flirt. Look at the road! Rory asks why Jess is intentionally flunking out of school. Jess answers, "Whatever." Rory talks about how great and brilliant and genius and perfect Jess is. She asks if it's a "cool" thing. Jess says he could care less about being cool. "Couldn't care less," Jess. It's "couldn't care less." Otherwise you do care. Man, why does he have to do every single thing that I hate? Jess says he's not going to college because college is so lame, man. Then Jess starts talking about Lorelai and how she's lame and how everybody sucks because everybody hates him so much. Rory says she doesn't want to hear his "Kurt Cobain-y thing." She keeps going on about how cool and awesome he is. Why don't you just date him, then, Rory? I'm so tired. Jess changes the subject to ask, over-enthusiastically, "So, Courtney! What about you?" Rory tells him that she's going to Harvard. Then she's going to be a journalist like Christiane Amanpour. Jess is pretty sure Rory couldn't hang in a tent with bombs going off all around her. He thinks it's too rough for her. Rory says it's not, and that she hopes it's not, because she's been talking about this forever. What about Fez, Rory? What about Fez?! Nobody's watching the road. Suddenly, Rory doesn't think she can do it anymore because Jess expressed a little doubt. She hates herself and thinks she's worthless because Jess doesn't have faith in her. So now Jess has to tell Rory how cool and awesome she is. Flirt, flirt, flirt. He says he'll help her practice by having her stand in the middle of the street as he drives straight for her, screaming in a foreign language. Rory laughs and says he'll have to learn one first. Jess says it's lucky he's got a tutor. They stare at each other for a long time, neither of them even glancing toward the road. After a bit, Jess says they should probably head back and study, since he promised they'd do that after ice cream. He says they could just turn off the road and just drive around in circles for a while. "Turn right," Rory says. Oh, just do it, already! "As you wish," Jess says, who's so not Westley. Jess turns to make the circles we've been watching them dance in all season long.