Episode Report Card Kim: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Pilot
By Kim | Season 1 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.27.2003
Jack and Ariel go to Nwamaka's office. Nwamaka is pissed that the "TSA" (which I thought was the new name of INS, but I looked it up and now it's BCIS, so who knows what that means) won't let Chinyere see her own child. Jack says that he's handling it. Nwamaka says that the authorities want to make an example of Chinyere -- that her family has received death threats, and that she'll be deported in two weeks. She asks Jack what he'll do. He starts to answer, and Nwamaka interrupts pointedly, "What are you going to do?" They stare at each other, and Jack quietly says that nothing will happen to Chinyere.
In a cab, Ariel asks about the charges against Chinyere. Jack says she's been charged with adultery. Ariel is surprised that adultery is a capital offense in Nigeria. Jack says, "It is in an Islamic court that has the same powers as a secular one. The government's predominantly Christian-controlled. They're not exactly looking to rock the boat." Ariel asks about the method of execution. Jack says that Chinyere's hands and feet will be tied, and that she'll be put at the bottom of an eight-foot pit. Then a bulldozer will push thousands of pounds of rocks on top of her. Yikes. Jack says it's all because she was raped by a village elder and gave birth to a girl. Ariel says that's another reason to be grateful for her life. "And how is your life?" Jack asks in an awkward segue." No, he really said that. Eesh. I'm not sure if that's bad writing, or if the writers are trying to make Jack out to be a douche. Ariel says that she has good and bad days, and some really bad days, but that she's been sober for five years. Jack always knew she'd get it together. Ariel says, "When they drag you from your dorm room in a straitjacket, screaming at the top of your lungs that your cat's trying to kill you, it doesn't exactly inspire confidence in your peers." Well, that bit of backstory is interesting. Was she on drugs? Crazy? Both? Ariel asks how Jack is doing, and whether he's still seeing Jennifer. Jack says that they broke up, and that it was his fault. Ariel says she's sorry, and asks what he's going to do about Chinyere. Jack says that he has one card left to play.
Jack meets up with Artie from The Larry Sanders Show in a restaurant. Why, is he going to book Chinyere on Larry's show to get publicity? Oh, that's his dad, the Senator. Jack greets him semi-warmly. The Senator yells to the waiter to bring some Scotch, even though Jack insists that he's fine. Jack gets a look on his face like this has happened before, a lot. It's that look you get around your parents when you realize that no matter how old you get, they're still going to treat you like you're in the second grade. The Senator asks Jack if he's still running, and then launches into a soliloquy about how daily exercise is the only way to go. The Senator asks why they don't see each other more often. Jack says it's because they don't like each other very much. The Senator laughs and says that it was "spoken true, like a Turner." The Senator offers his condolences on Barrington's death. Jack accepts a drink. Heh. The Senator asks the waiter to give them some privacy. As soon as the waiter leaves, The Senator asks Jack what he wants. Jack says he has a client seeking political asylum, and briefly outlines the case. The Senator launches into a bunch of Latin indicating what legal actions Jack should take. Jack's responses are just as quick, proving that his legal mind is as sharp s his father's. Jack says that the only hope is a Presidential intervention. The Senator's like, "Sure! No biggie." Jack says he wouldn't ask if he thought there was any other way. The Senator demeans Jack's work as "fighting for Jill and Joe Six-Pack." Jack should have said, "If you mean the good people who elected you into office, then yes." Instead, he's silent. The Senator wants to eat, but Jack wants to leave. The Senator basically commands Jack to stay and orders his meal for him, to boot.