Episode Report Card Deborah: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT "Can You See Them / See Right Through Them"
By Deborah | Season 2 | Episode 14 | Aired on 01.27.2005
Joan's walking down the street later the same day. She's wearing some kind of scarf under her jacket -- or maybe it's a sweater with a really complicated collar -- that has a bunch of big pearls sewn up the side in a long cluster. (I'm not explaining this very well.) I didn't know what it was at first and I still don't, but it's kind of growing on me. Not that I could wear anything like that. It would look like it was growing on me. She sits down at the bus stop next to some loony lady you just know is God. She's played by HITG! Veanne Cox. She makes a production out of moving her bag, and asking Joan, as she returns to her cross-stitching (or whatever), "Comfy?" She smiles a big, toothy, almost creepy smile at Joan, who just rubs her hands for warmth and doesn't reply. If I were Joan I would be suspicious of absolutely every stranger who spoke to me for any reason. Well, actually, I'm like that anyway, but if I were Joan, people wouldn't call me distrustful and paranoid. Freaky friendly lady: "They should really put benches at all the bus stops. Make the world a better place, one tush at a time." Yeah, and you know what we need even more than benches? Shelters. Hello? What good is a bench if I have to sit in the rain, snow, or freezing cold? Oh, what do I care? In a week, I'll have my license -- God willing -- and I'll turn into a lazy, pollution-spewing, big-fat-environmental-footprint-leaving, to-the-gym-driving car potato like everybody else. She adds, "What do you think, Joan?" She smiles creepily at Joan, who just looks at her, and finally says, "God says 'tush'?" Which is the best possible thing she could have said.
God, called "Personable Woman God" in the script, but called "Freaky Friendly God" in the recap, blathers on about what a crisp day it is and whether Joan had a nice day in school. Joan: "Okay, homework overdose here…" What? This God seems like a hybrid of 1970s Mary Tyler Moore and Marcia Cross on Desperate Housewives (leading one poster -- tljgator -- to refer to her as "Bree Van De God"). Freaky Friendly God: "Just thought I'd ask…show I care…'cause…I do." She sounds on the verge of tears for the last two words. But she's smiling. She may be the weirdest God yet. Joan: "And you always want something. What is it this time?" But she sounds more good-humoured and less petulant about it than usual. Freaky Friendly God wants a latte. She glances toward some street vendor where the pastel posse is hanging out and chewing the fat. Ew -- the one in the light blue coat is wearing pink boots and carrying a slouchy gold -- yes, shiny gold -- shoulderbag. Is that the in thing? I sure hope not, because it's goshdanged fugly. Uggs, low-rise pants, can't I catch a visual break here? Joan: "Oh no…not them. And the Lord sayeth, 'Get me a latte…'" Freaky Friendly says a little act can mean a lot. Joan: "Wouldn't the three dollars be better spent helping the poor?" Freaky Friendly knows Joan was going to spend that money on Slim Jims. Joan gets up in a huff as Freaky Friendly adds, "Two sugars, please." Frink: "I guess God doesn't believe in The Maker's Diet."