Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT When the chips are down...
By Gustave | Season 2 | Episode 21 | Aired on 04.28.2003
Yulin is dismissed from the witness box, and Palmer is invited to present any evidence he wants to the cabinet. Palmer speaks. He claims he has evidence that Yulin planted a B-O-M-B on U.S. soil. "While my behavior was extreme, I was only reacting to the extremity of the day's events," says Palmer, arguing that the bombing of innocent countries will rank as one of the most despicable sneak attacks ever, and that there will never be peace in the Middle East as a result. "We must delay the attack until we are certain of our ground." PoorMan'sAlexanderHaig interrupts with a message from Chappelle. Chappelle informs the cabinet that there is evidence in CTU's possession that the Cyprus tapes are forgeries. The evidence won't be available for fifteen minutes, however. PoorMan'sAlexanderHaig declares that they should wait for the results of the evidence before proceeding.
Back at CTU, Bitchelle is on the phone with IT. No dice. Neither of them can retrieve anything from the chip. It's damaged. Bitchelle has, however, found the signature of the hacker who encoded the chip. Chappelle enters and asks what they have. Soul Patch tells Chappelle that the chip is more damaged than they thought; they don't have any evidence to show Palmer. "So Kiefer wasted our time," says Chappelle, exiting with a little turd face of his own going on. The time is 04:37:30 AM.
The time is 04:42:01 AM. As the rednecks are taken away by the police and Kiefer puts on a pair of shoes he "commandeered" from one of them, it seems that Cate is upset. She's sad. How does Kiefer deduce this? Because Cate is sulking all over her butcher block kitchen table and hiding her head in her hands. "I keep thinking it's all my fault!" says Cate, obviously having bribed the writers into writing her character an Emmy-clip-worthy survivor's-guilt moment. And not only is it an Emmy clip moment, but it's the beginning of Cate and Kiefer luvin'. Kiefer comes over to her, takes her in his arms, and, with his Sutherland velvety whisper on full blast, reminds her that she was the one who helped him find the B-O-M-B in the first place, and that her efforts saved millions of lives today. "But my sister was the one behind the B-O-M-B…" argues Self-Hate Cate. "But you're not you're sister," says Kiefer. He strokes her hair and pulls her to him. And Cate bathes in the rays of Kiefer's embrace for a long time. She absorbs its healing effects like a visit to Lourdes. I hear, incidentally, that if you get a drop of Kiefer sweat on you, it heals psoriasis, eczema, and shingles forever. But wait, it's not about the spirit. It's about the flesh. Cate pulls back demurely, and Kiefer is just about to go in for the big kiss with tongue and everything…when his cell phone rings. It's Soul Patch and Bitchelle, breaking the bad news that there were no audio files retrieved from the chip. However, Bitchelle did find junk code that may have been put there by a notorious hacker named Alex Hewitt, who left it behind as a signature. Soul Patch tells Kiefer that Chappelle is not going to let him follow up on any more leads from CTU, so Kiefer might as well check out Alex Hewitt. Soul Patch gives Kiefer Hewitt's last known North Hollywood address. So much for that kiss. Cate makes another turd face and tells Kiefer to be careful on his new mission.