Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: B | 122 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead
By Cindy McLennan | Season 5 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.24.2013
Caroline happens upon Stefan just after he's snagged a bottle. When she calls out his name, he greets her with a, "Caroline Forbes, my best friend." He doesn't remember her but he's seen pictures and says she's much hotter in person. When she asks if he's okay, Stefan says, "If by okay, you mean heavily spiraling into Ripper oblivion, then yes, I'm dandy."
Jesse approaches with a couple of cups of beer, but Caroline asks him to give them a minute. Stefan adds, "Yeah, that's probably a good idea, because I can sense from here that you have a paper cut on the palm of your right hand, and I want rip your entire arm off." Caroline snaps, "Stefan," then turns to Jesse, turns on her compulsion eyes, and says, "Go away. Hide. I'll find you." I sure hope Jesse isn't one of the Whitmore kids ingesting vervain.
Alone with Stefan, Caroline says, "Look, I know you're hungry but you don't do people, okay. It doesn't end well." Stefan asks if she has any blood bags. Caroline has some in the car and asks Stefan to come with her. He nods like he's going to, but he Stealth Salvatores away. Caroline closes her eyes and looks like she's playing "Anywhere But Here," and yet there she stands.
We cut to a crypt, probably the Salvatore crypt because why the hell not. Jesse calls Caroline and leaves her a confused message, like you do when you've been compelled to hide during some lameass holiday on which people get drunk in cemeteries and ring bells. Before he can end the call, Stefan Stealth Salvatores up behind, vamps out, and sinks his fangs into Jesse's flesh. Commercial.
I'm not sure if Jesse pushes Stefan off, or Stefan pushes himself off. He's got blood dribbling out of either corner of his mouth, but at least his chin isn't soaked, like Elena's often is. When Jesse says he doesn't know what Stefan is, Stefan is quick to fill him in. "Oh, I'm a Ripper. Do you know what that means?" Hide your cell phone, Jesse. Stefan expounds: "That means I literally can't stop feeding until I rip someone's head off. But look at us. We're working it out." Jesse begs for Stefan to let him go. Stefan knows he should. "I'm good, right? I'm compassionate. I live with this burning hunger inside of me that allows me to stay in control." What? Stefan doesn't have time to clarify. He's speechifying. "But what do I have to show for it, huh? [...] I have no memories because my brain was fried. My brother, who's been my brother for 160 some odd years, stole my girlfriend. And my girlfriend let him. So, you tell me what's the point of being good?"