Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT All about Todd
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.01.2002
While he and Nina make their way out of the Palmer Suite, Kiefer puts in a call to Soul Patch asking after the Kieferettes at the Safe House. Soul Patch lies and says he hasn't heard anything. Kiefer asks him for the Safe House number. Soul Patch puts him on hold and tries once again to konvince Xander to kome klean about the missing Kieferettes. Xander picks up the phone and asks Kiefer where he is. Kiefer tells about his plan to go ahead with LittleTerrorBrother's drop-off, and asks for back-up. Xander promises to send a team, then tells Kiefer that the Kieferettes are sleeping and shouldn't be disturbed. Kiefer asks Xander to have the Kieferettes call him back when they wake up. The time is 5:12:04 PM.
Direct TV is such a great service that you will literally put off having sex with your wife in order to let the installer inside your home. Ashley Judd needs to "wake up and smell the napalm." Hey, it's Doctor Funk. Five different kinds of Mint Skittles. Whatever. Die, Carrot Top, die!
Oh, and I just wanted to take this opportunity to announce that my favorite book from last summer is now out in paperback -- Son of a Grifter, by Kent Walker and Mark Schone -- and none of you have any excuse now not to buy and read it. Remember Sante Kimes, that con woman who got her son to kill Irene Silverman and was later played by Mary Tyler Moore in the TV movie? Well, Son of a Grifter is co-written by the first son, and it's the most insanely fabulous read ever. There's this amazing chapter that takes place in the parking lot of a strip mall that I'm not going to ruin. Furthermore, last week I learned that Mark Schone -- the co-writer that's not the son -- and I have a common friend, who informed me that Mark lives in my neighborhood. He even answered one of my stalkerish emails. I told him I was telling everyone I knew to buy his book and he was all, "Yeah, thanks, Oprah."
The time is 5:16:27 PM. Klockwise from the top left, Kiefer and Nina drive to the drop-off, Spawn plays with her flippy hair and searches through Dan's room, and Lady Mac sits very still for some reason. Where did this new Kiefmobile come from? I thought they traveled to the Palmer hotel in a helicopter. Nevertheless, Nina and Kiefer are driving to the drop-off point in an SUV, finishing up their konversation about what Nina told Bride back at the Safe House. Nina's hair just keeps looking better and better the longer the day drags on. What's up with that? Nina explains that she kouldn't "finish the debrief" after Bride konfronted her. Debrief! It's still hilarious! She wonders if she made a mistake by leaving the Kieferettes. Kiefer assures her that she did the right thing. Irony? Just a tad. Plus, adds Kiefer, he really should have told Bride himself. Nina assures Kiefer that he can work things out with Bride and that he should probably call her right now. Kiefer asks Nina to call HandsomeBlackGuard and see if the Kieferettes have woken up from their nap yet. No answer. Must be a problem with Nina's cell phone.