Episode Report Card Sara M: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Sphincter Says What?
By Sara M | Season 9 | Episode 11 | Aired on 11.28.2004
Ruthie comes downstairs and asks for a ride to school. RevCam says he can't do it. The two turn to watch Annie whiz through the room with the blue shirt Lucy requested firmly in hand. "She's going to kill us all," Ruthie says about Lucy, as if Lucy was the one who tried to suffocate the twins last night. RevCam asks Ruthie why she isn't getting ride to school with Martin. Ruthie says Martin is in a bad mood and she'd rather take the bus. And she does.
Martin enters the kitchen and asks where Ruthie is. Annie runs back in, only to be summoned by Lucy, who wants her Oprah magazine, because Lucy is the kind of person who reads Oprah magazine. She used to enjoy Rosie too, but when she found out that Rosie was gay she had to cancel her subscription. RevCam tells Martin that Ruthie took the bus, and asks Martin if anything's going on with him. Martin says he's just tired, and leaves.
Annie runs back downstairs, only to be yelled at through the baby monitor that she gave Lucy the wrong Oprah. Annie turns around and runs back upstairs. RevCam just watches her go. Apparently, men aren't allowed to take care of pregnant women. SamVid come downstairs and report that they have accidentally put on each other's clothes, but they're too tired to change. But how many pairs of underwear are they wearing? SamVid say they are also "too tired" to go to school. I know the feeling, kids.
Annie runs downstairs and says that Lucy wants to talk to RevCam. RevCam tells her to say he's not home. "BUT DADDY, THAT'S A LIE!" Sam says, delivering his clearest line ever, much to RevCam's chagrin. "I know you're there, Dad," Lucy squawks from the monitor, "I won't be ignored." She then threatens to chase him down. RevCam stares at the monitor, his face filled with sadness. He calls to Lucy that he'll be right up. He and Annie exchange "our daughter sucks so bad" shrugs as he passes.
Lucy greets her father/servant with a "you look awful!" RevCam hints that he's very tired. Lucy hands him a list of books and articles for her teen empowerment class, and I'm sure they'll really appreciate the reading assignments. "Are you okay?" RevCam asks his daughter. She says that her baby almost died (not really) and now she is a prisoner in her home -- "wait -- not my home. Your home." So she acknowledges that this is RevCam's house, and yet she'll still keep everyone up all night? I hate her.
A sing-songy voice whispers into a sleeping Kevin's ear. "Keeevvviinn!" it says. "KINKIRK!" shouts an angry Capt. Michaels. Kevin wakes up, only to see that the entire police station has gathered around the jail bed he's resting on to point and laugh at him. Remind me to commit crime in Glenoak, where the police officers are this easily distracted. Capt. Michaels sends Kevin home to take care of Lucy, who Capt. Michaels is totally in love with. Kevin begs and begs not to go home to his horrible wife, but it is to no avail. "Get a hold of yourself, Kinkirk! Be a man!" says Capt. Michaels.