Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Inn Fection
By Gustave | Season 3 | Episode 16 | Aired on 03.29.2004
Elsewhere inside Inn Fection, a employee named Margolis is punching out and leaving the building. Margolis looks like a middle-aged Elijah Wood. Gay Matt tells him he needs to stay. "I can't do any O.T.," says MiddleAgedElijahWood. "My wife's a week overdue." Man with pregnant wife? Man who's going to die soon. Just saying. Gay Matt lies about an "irritant" in the air that might require extra personnel to deal with the guests who might be affected. "But I promise to get you out of here as soon as I can," says Gay Matt. MiddleAgedElijahWood is unimpressed.
Flu Bar. Wow, whadda shock -- Amador jimmies the pipe and escapes from CTU custody. Double shock -- Spawn is tracking him on a CTU computer. And that's about the only thing she's going to do tonight. ["At least until the V-I-R-U-S hits the big-cat section of the L.A. zoo." -- Sars] She calls Kiefer and tells him that Amador has left the building. The time is 4:11:46 AM.
Okay, you know how at the end of this Steven Segal ad for Mountain Dew, the words "Do the Dew!" show up on the glass doors of the convenience store? I have seen this ad at least six times, and every single time those words appear, I swear for a second it says, "Do the Jew!" and I do a double take.
The time is 4:16:24 AM. Palmer is getting the news from Brother Palmer about the happenings at Inn Fection: 1000 guests, more V-I-R-U-S planted elsewhere, no one allowed in or out, curtail mass panic, yadda yadda yadda. Brother Palmer exits to go do something governmental, and Lady Mac enters with a cup of coffee in hand to tell Palmer that Mrs. Ocean has just told the police that Lady Mac was there to withhold medicine when William Ocean III went down for a dirt nap. Palmer asks Lady Mac if these allegations are true. "Does that really matter?" asks Lady Mac. "Only you could say something like that," says Palmer. God, I feel so bad for Palmer right now. That evil woman who he invited to his office to go do something evil to one of his political opponents has…done something evil. Why does that keep happening? It's just like how Liza keeps marrying these gay men and Michael Jackson keeps getting sued by these kids who come over to his house to play naked pinball. Lady Mac chastises Palmer for demanding the truth but surrounding himself with people who protect him from the truth nonetheless. "But I don't ask to be protected," says Palmer. "That may be true, but the fact remains you have been," says Lady Mac. "I'm going to take you at your word. I'm actually going to tell you the truth." She proceeds to tell him exactly what happened at the Ocean residence earlier that evening and how she and Mrs. Ocean watched William die and withheld his medication, et cetera. "That's murder," says Palmer. Hey, Palmer, do you have a law degree or something? Lady Mac tells Palmer that she told the police that she had nothing to do with William Ocean's death because she was here with Palmer, and that the police are going to ask Palmer to confirm this. "And you expect me to do that?" says an outraged Palmer. Palmer? Considering that you let her get away with letting a nuclear bomb into the country last season, we not only expect you to "do that," but we are also thinking that you'll fetch her a latte while you're at it. Lady Mac retorts that if Palmer doesn't lie for her, she'll tell the police that she was at the Ocean manse "acting on the President's behalf." Palmer points out that he never told her to kill William Ocean. Lady Mac reminds him that he specifically told her to "take all necessary measures" to solve his problem with William Ocean III. "Now that's a nice sound bite for the media!" says Lady Mac, waving her manicure around. "I never used those words," says Palmer, crinkling up his face. "Well," says Lady Mac, "think it over." She exits. Palmer stares at his desk really hard.