Episode Report Card Demian: F | 1 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT "Pointless Filler Episode Number 128"
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 17 | Aired on 03.13.2004
Outside, Freebie, Todd, and Ramona skitter down the sidewalk as about five squad cars pull up to the front of the hotel. The cops jog in to break up the riot. Todd decides to "borrow" one of the squad cars, so the three morons hop into the nearest and peel off. Raige emerges onto the sidewalk in time to eat their exhaust. Scene.
Meanwhile, over in a purportedly tony dining establishment, my very pretty and disappointingly dim husband has no idea what mutton is. Sigh. Chris. Your mother's a chef. Why don't you know what mutton is? Hmm? Is it because this show is ass, and should I simply say, "Whatever"? It is, and I should? All-righty, then. The waiter is "French" and therefore snotty. Daddy Dearest instructs the snotty "French" waiter to bring them a couple of steaks. Once the waiter has disappeared, Victor apologizes to Big Gay Chris, explaining that he thought Chris might have liked a fancy meal. "Trying to live up to my rep," he shrugs with a game smile. "With cigars and mutton?" Chris snorts. "Sorry, Grandpa, that's not how you did it." "Did I take you to batting cages?" Victor asks. Big Chris shakes his shaggy head, for he is as crappy at athletic endeavors as I. "Strip clubs?" Victor guesses. "GOD, no!" Chris squeals, for the girls -- they are so icky. Snerk. Chris finally admits, "You just...we talked." An awkward silence follows, after which Chris, clearly uncomfortable with this forced amity, attempts to bail due to that demon situation he's working on. Daddy Dearest insists that he stay, though, so he can find out why "[Piper's] such a terrible mother." Big Chris is shocked. "No, no -- she's great," he insists. "Then why are you treating her like she doesn't exist?" Victor wonders. Big Gay Chris takes a few seconds to respond, which is a few seconds too long, because we all saw "Chris-Crossed" and already know what the answer is. "Because she doesn't exist in my future, okay?" Chris finally admits, getting all emotional and teary-eyed. Aw. "She dies when I turn fourteen," he adds before shaking his head and glumming, "I've already said too much. The point is? After I save [the littlest Psycho], I have to go back to where she isn't. I can't get close to her because I don't want to lose her again." Oh, my pretty and dim husband is crying! Sniff. Victor, desperate to add something worthwhile to this conversation, suggests, "Maybe that's all the more reason to get close to her." Chris just slumps back in his chair and chokes back tears.
Somewhere...else, squad cars shriek through an abandoned industrial area while Todd, Ramona, and Freebie hide out in a nearby warehouse. At least, I think it's a warehouse. Then again, I don't really care, because this show is ass, so whatever. They bang their hormonal heads together and decide to go visit Rick Gittridge in the county jail. Yawn.