Episode Report Card Erin: C+ | 2 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT If by "awful" you mean "awfully convenient for Jack."
By Erin | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 01.11.2005
Syd catches up to Jack and has obviously questioned him about why he's giving Nadia her psych tests. Jack just blabbles something about how one of the tests he's going to give Nadia will determine how she'll react under stressful circumstances when she learns of "delicate intel." Syd's all, delicate intel? You wouldn't be referring to the death of our mother, would you? Jack's all, whatever, I know you're going to tell Nadia the truth and fine, nothing I can do about that, but when are you gonna do it? Now? Two hours before you leave for an operation? Or during some more appropriate occasion like, say, Nadia's wedding to Weiss or when you're both rotting away in an old folks' home in San Diego? Syd just says she's planning on telling Nadia the truth when she gets home from the assignment. Jack's all, okay, great! Understood! "And I agree," he says. "It's for the best." Syd looks carefully at her father. "What are you up to, Dad?" Heh. Jack just looks at her for a second, then something catches his eye in the distance. "They're waiting for you, Sydney," he says, with that famous Bristow glint in his eye. Syd walks off to another part of the Apple Store, and Victor Garber picks up a piece of paper on some random desk and pretends to read it. And that's when I notice something. Victor Garber has the biggest feet I've ever seen. I mean, maybe not bigger than Shaq's or Andre the Giant's, but they're half the length of the desk and as flat as pancakes. I'm not trying to be mean -- it's just an observation. They're huge. And, no, I'm not even touching the myth about hands and feet, okay? I'm just not. Shut up.
Across the way but out of earshot, Nadia's watched the entire exchange between Syd and Jack. Sloane walks up and says her name. Nadia turns to him and asks, "Is he always so cold?" They both consider Jack for a second. "Jack?" says Sloane in a matter-of-fact tone. "I'm afraid so." Hee. Sloane then asks if Nadia's free for dinner. "There's this restaurant on Melrose that serves Argentinean food," he says. Then he pauses and smiles at her. "We can go any place you like." "I'd like that," says Nadia sweetly. Okay, a week ago Nadia was Ms. I Want Nothing To Do With My Father Or His Dirty Life and now she's Ms. Let's Have Dinner And Get To Know Each Other Because I Love You Daddy? Yeah. I don't buy it. I think they're up to something. I really do. ["Also, Rifkin's delivery needs to be more paternal and less Chinatown. I'm just saying." -- Sars] Sloane sees Jack eyeballing the two of them and tells his daughter that he'll see her when she's through with the psych evaluation. Nadia walks over to Jack, passing the Conference Room of Endless Expositions as she goes.
We catch up with the team as Vaughn's discussing Bishop and the dozen industrial properties he owns in Spain. There's an awesome shot of Michael Vartan's hands messing around with some papers and a computer and damn! He's got him some pretty hands. Oh, to be a piece of paper or an errant prop…right. So, the Valta could be housed in any one of Bishop's industrial properties. Also, Bishop recently purchased this crazy-ass powerful server. "Well, you don't buy a server like that to look at online porn, huh?" snerks Marshall. Heh. Vaughn's all, no, you twit. You buy it to coordinate international business operations. Shut up. Marshall looks chastened. So, Syd pipes up that the location of the Valta is probably on that server and that server is on Bishop's estate. Marshall explains that you can't hack into the server from the outside, you have to be physically in front of it. Unfortunately, Bishop's security on the estate is out-of-control high-tech and impossible to get past. Marshall blabbers something about a wicked cool laser lock pick he's invented that's housed in a watch but that sometimes the watch overheats. Or something. It'll be important later, trust me. So, whatever, Syd surmises that they need to get into that house, get into the server, and that will tell them where Bishop's hiding the Valta. You know, in case you haven't been listening to the last ten minutes. "So, how do you break into the house of a master thief?" ponders Vaughn. "I don't think you do," responds Syd. "I think you have to be invited."