Episode Report Card Niki: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Go Greyhound
By Niki | Season 2 | Episode 21 | Aired on 04.24.2001
It's a woman from Lily's lawyer's office. She informs Lily that they're sending over some papers later in the day, and that Lily needs to sign them in order to finalize the divorce. And that, my friends, is the scrap of information we've been waiting for all season: Lily and Jake are not yet divorced. There was no magic, behind-the-scenes proceeding that we missed. And we're not crazy. Lily is going to sign her divorce papers with one hand while signing her marriage license with the other. In fact, she wryly says, "Oh, right. That would help, wouldn't it, since I'm getting married again." The humorless legal lady says, "I imagine it would." She tells Lily that they'll need the papers back as soon as possible. Lily glances at Grace sitting next to her, and uneasily asks, "Has Jake...has Jake signed everything?" The woman assures Lily that Jake has, and that everything is in order. Lily thanks her and hangs up. She has only a split second to put her head in her hands and sigh before the phone rings again. She jumps, remembering that she left Rick hanging on the other line. She hops out of her seat as she answers, softly telling him that her lawyer is sending over her divorce papers. They both agree that that's good, and that they'll see one another later.
Cut to the high-school hallway, as the bell is ringing. Wannabe's struggling to shove a huge carpetbag into her locker. Eli sneaks up behind her and says he doesn't think it's going to fit. She grabs him, agreeing, and gives him a loud kiss. She grabs his hand and leads him into an empty classroom, throwing him up against the wall. "Let's go to Amsterdam!" she says, with a devilish little grin. Eli thinks she's kidding, but she says that they should go in the summer. Wannabe whips up a romantic vagabond scenario: hitchhiking, roaming the streets of Paris, doing whatever they want. She says that they can go to Prague. "Prague?" Eli says with a dubious laugh. "Yeah, I hear it's really starting to happen," Wannabe says. Yeah, it's been "starting to happen" for a few years now. Wannabe's really got her finger on the pulse, doesn't she? They kiss again as the bell rings, and Wannabe hoists her bag onto her shoulder. Eli asks what it's for, and Wannabe sighs that she isn't going home. "Ever?" Eli asks. Wannabe drones on about the cliché that is her "evil stepmother," who's threatening to "send [her] back to that place." By "that place," she means "rehab." Eli is horrified. Wannabe gripes that Evil Stepmother claims she stole Vicodin out of her medicine cabinet. Wannabe spits that it's "a complete and utter lie." Because we all know that Wannabe abhors thievery, don't we? She blahs on that her dad will believe Evil Stepmother, and that Wannabe will be sent packing. Now aren't you glad we did those warm-up exercises? I'm up to three eye rolls, and we're barely four minutes into the show. Worried, Eli asks what she's going to do. Wannabe shifts into her tough-cookie routine and smiles, grabs the back of his head, and pulls him in for another kiss. She says she'll "figure it out" and that he shouldn't "worry [his] pretty little head about it." See what she did there? Turning the gender tables like that. She's a pistol. She struts away, leaving Eli to worry his pretty, spiky little head.