Episode Report Card Sara M: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Another Episode About Dead Soldiers
By Sara M | Season 9 | Episode 7 | Aired on 10.24.2004
The next day at school, Mac is pissed at Martin for ditching him. But he's also curious if anything happened between Martin and Martha. Martin denies everything and says that he's going to tell Martha that he's not a cop as soon as he gets home. Mac says he can tell her now, and points out that she's walking up the stairs. Before Martin can escape, Martha spots him and asks what he's doing there. Before Martin can answer, she assumes he's working undercover. She explains that she's a substitute teacher (like anyone thought she was a student), and that their secret is safe with her. She's certainly making it no secret that she's eighty, what with the dowdy pink sweater, ugly flower brooch, and positively antique pearl necklace she's sporting. She asks Martin to call her later.
At the Glenoak PD, Kevin's cop buddies get some coffee and laugh about how Kevin was calling them last night for Martha's number to get himself some late-night booty. They all know Martha's number, but none of them would give it to Kevin because they didn't want to get him in trouble with the horrible Lucy. Then sleeping baby cop walks up and says he gave Kevin Martha's number, which he had because she used to baby-sit his kid. Which isn't so far-fetched when you think about the classic story The Berenstain Bears and the Sitter, in which Brother and Sister Bear were upset because their new baby-sitter was a crotchety old woman. The cops gossip about Kevin's adulterous ways until Capt. Michaels walks by, overhears them, and is all "who in the what now?"
Kevin's getting lectured in the CamKitchen. He apologizes for being responsible for Martin coming home late (even though he really wasn't), but that's still not enough for Annie, who adds that Martin looks up to Kevin, and "there are enough bad influences out there." Annie seems to have returned to the Clownface of Suicidal Despair she was sporting all through Season Eight.
I guess Ben is still around, because he's walking through the kitchen, apparently home from a camping trip with some Glenoak firemen. Obviously, he's lying about who he was with, because he's all "firemen who fight fires, that's who I was camping with, firemen." Come on, Ben! You're not allowed to over-exposit like that unless you're talking about Martin's father, the marine who fights in Iraq, next to Iran, that Iraq. Lucy runs in and asks Kevin why he isn't at work yet; Capt. Michaels just called looking for him. Kevin runs out the door, and Lucy asks Ben why he didn't come back yesterday, like he was supposed to. Ben just says that one of the guys wanted to stay an extra day. RevCam and Annie look at each other, all suspicious. Lucy tells Ben that that's interesting, since last episode's Doctor English left a message for Ben that she had a "wonderful time" over the weekend and to call her. Oh, BUSTED! You had premarital sex, Ben! Now you have to go to therapy! Lucy whines that Ben lying to her makes her "uncomfortable," because Ben is related to Kevin, so if Ben can lie to her, then Kevin can too. It's the Transitive Property of Immorality. I'm sure it's in the Bible. Lucy storms out of the house, followed by Ben, and the CamRents examine their coffee cups. I think Annie's trying to figure out how to drown herself in hers.