Episode Report Card Sars: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Dance
By Sars | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 01.26.1998
Cut to the hallway, where Dawson tears down Cliff's movie, Helmets Of Glory, and Joey sympathizes by looking contemptuous. He whines about Cliff writing, directing, and starring in the movie. He complains about Cliff entering it in the film festival, and refers to it as "my film festival." He calls it "a thin and pedestrian sports film." The ever-loyal Joey cringes. Just down the hall from them, we see Cliff introducing himself to Jen; Dawson mutters incredulously, "This isn't happening." Cliff offers to introduce Jen around, or take her out, to help her get acclimated, and Jen says she'll let him know once she gets settled. They banter a bit more, and Jen walks off while Cliff looks at her ass, and Jen turns to look over her shoulder at Cliff and blows right past Dawson and Joey, and Dawson looks depressed as Joey says, "I told you, Dawson. They move fast in New York."
Shake 'n' Bake is, as it turns out, the secret to juicy chicken. I can't speak for anyone else, but I know I'll sleep better tonight.
Dawson barrels down the stairs of the Nookie Hacienda, Joey's fake head in one hand and XXXL clothes a-flapping, to ask Mitch "The Flash" Leery if he's seen his camcorder. I don't think Mitch can see a whole lot with those novelty glasses he's got on, but anyway, he asks Dawson, "Filming today?" Dawson nods and says, "Joey gets decapitated." Mitch says the camcorder is in his and Gail's bedroom on the nighttable, and suggests that Dawson "might want to take the tape out." ["KHAN!" -- Wing Chun] Okay, let me get this straight. If Mitch keeps her so busy "performing" for the camera, why does Gail "Standard Poodle" Leery need a man on the side?
Anyhow, Dawson looks disgusted and says that "you can get arrested for that in some states." He watches Mitch work on his restaurant model for a moment before saying, "I have a question. It's kind of a girl-slash-relationship question," and he warns Mitch not to let it go to his head that he's asked for fatherly advice, adding, "Because I clearly don't condone yours and Mom's perverse sex life." As if anyone asked you, Dawson. Dawson then admits that his inexperience "is hindering my current female relations." Mitch manages not to slap Dawson upside the head, telling him instead to get to the point, and Dawson says tensely, "Mechanics of kissing." Mitch removes his glasses and asks how he can help, and they sit down, and Dawson props Joey's fake head on the table and says, "I'm interested in technique." Mitch explains, "Well, there is no 'technique,' Dawson -- you just put your lips together and go." Dawson: "But what makes a good kiss?" Mitch starts to relate a tale about the first time he kissed Gail, and Dawson breaks in with, "Now don't get too detailed," and Mitch stops short and stares at his son, probably wondering why neither he nor his wife ever got around to drowning Dawson in a boot.