Episode Report Card Erin: B- | 1 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Talk about wearing your heart on your sleeve...
By Erin | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 2006.10.09
We then see a woman lounging on a bed, staring into a laptop computer. Matt enters and comments that the woman waited up for him, so I guess this is his wife. The wife he was supposed to attend counseling with earlier, before he got arrested for sticking household implements into innocent people and removing their brains. Mrs. Parkman is immediately cheesed off at her husband, and he immediately starts apologizing for missing the session. He meant to call her, but he forgot because he had the most amazing, incredible, insane day today and he doesn't even know how to begin to describe it. Save your breath, Matt; Mrs. Parkman stopped listening right about the minute you opened the front door. In fact, she just tells him not to bother telling her about it. "That's it?" he says, incredulous. "That's it? You waited up all this time so you could tell me you don't want to talk to me?" Pretty much, Matt.
She says that she doesn't want this to turn into a fight, and if they talk, she's sure it will. She then pulls that passive-aggressive "our marriage means nothing to you" bullshit that some people are really good at. I'm an expert at the strategically placed "Nothing" myself. "What's wrong?" "Nothing." "Really? You seem weird." "Huh. That's funny. Because I don't FEEL weird." "No, really, what's wrong?" "Oh, NOTHING." My boyfriends LOVE that. Matt blows up at her, saying that he does care about this marriage, but he has a lot of shit going on right now; you know, like SAVING THE WORLD? She just gets in his face and says that she has a lot of shit going on too and that it was supposed to be a good thing when she made associate at the firm but ever since she did, it's been like he's mad at her for getting what she wanted because he hasn't. Oh, burn. Not his fault he's dyslexic and a bad test-taker, lady. Why don't you go put your bra on and go get us some damn Dove bars and make yourself useful instead of bringing everybody down?
The second she drops the insult in his lap, she immediately looks regretful and pushes past him so her back is to him. Matt says he doesn't mean to be unhappy about her success, it's just that it's hard for him. "I can't do this anymore," she says in her mind. "I wish he would just leave." It's unclear whether or not Matt realizes that she hasn't actually said this out loud, but he responds, "Fine. I will." Mrs. Parkman looks baffled as to how her husband somehow heard her thoughts. He leaves to go get drunk and listen to the thoughts of sad barflies.