Episode Report Card Jessica: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Everything Put Together Falls Apart
By Jessica | Season 6 | Episode 9 | Aired on 11.19.2002
Office Party Of My Mental Breakdown. Two tarted-up hoochies admire themselves in the mirror in the ladies room and talk about how hot, hot, hot they are. "Hey, what about that punk freak? What is she even doing here?" one of the them asks. In the stall, Emma sits on the toilet and smiles to herself. One of the tarts tells the other that she hears that the punk freak was rude to Bobby Briggs and can you believe it? Emma strolls out of the stall and washes her hands. "Yeah? And why shouldn't I be? He's a little wanker," she says. The tarts don't contest this. "Yeah, but don't you want to win?" one of them asks. Emma is all, "Huh?" So the tarts explain that this office party is also a Hottest Date Contest, because apparently it's 1963 and this isn't actually an office, it's a frat house. And also, no one has ever heard of sexual harassment. I mean, seriously. What the hell? This is absurd. This is beyond absurd. Do no women work in that office? Does no one with a functioning brain cell work in that office? This plot point is bullshit, and it insults the audience's intelligence. ["Which differs from any other plot point on the show in the last six years…exactly not at all." -- Sars] I know this show isn't supposed to be a true-to-life drama -- by any stretch of the imagination -- but at the same time, a plotline like this is just beyond the scope of anyone's suspension of disbelief. It would never happen. And it's stupid. And for Pacey to buy into this kind of crap does a total disservice to his character. God, I hate this show.
Party. Pacey waits in corner. Bobby Briggs: "Where's your sassy pseudo-punk, Witter? I was hoping for another round." Pacey: "She's not here and I can't blame her. The way you treated her was unnecessary." Jessica: "Sweet Mary, SHUT UP!" Then Pacey gives one of his typical White Knight speeches about how Emma is too good for Bobby Briggs and she's ten times the person he'll ever be and blah blah blah they're so getting together at the end of the this episode, aren't they? Pacey and Emma, I mean, not Pacey and Bobby. Bobby Briggs gives Pacey a dirty look. "If you consider this such a waste of your time, we can remedy that come Monday morning," he says. "It's all well and good, this back-and-forth. But what you seemed to have forgotten, or what you've actually never learned, is that I'm your boss. You're not precious to me," he continues. And that's when I fell in love with Bobby Briggs. Because anyone who (mis)quotes David Silver is okay in my book. "In fact, you're on thin ice. You watch it when you open your mouth up to me, Witter. I'm not your friend. I'm the guy who's in charge of your future. Which is currently bleak," Bobby Briggs says, and storms off. Pacey looks, yes, put-upon. Is it wrong that I'm wishing for a giant nuclear bomb to hit Boston in the next episode, killing them all in one fiery, beautiful instant?