Episode Report Card M. Giant: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The EMP Strikes Back
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 13 | Aired on 03.13.2005
Stationed in one of the sporting goods store's two front windows, Kiefer peers out into the street and spots one commando creeping along the street. "It's time," he tells Grayadder. "No one fires until I give the order," he tells the brothers, who nod. They still stand with Kiefer, their fellow American, in denouncing and resisting all forms of terrorism, but silently this time. Kiefer unshoulders his sniper rifle and gets a bead on Handsome Black Commando. The crosshairs intersect on the handsome black cheekbone, and then Kiefer deliberately aims wide and puts a round in the wall inches in front of the man's face. Handsome Black Commando recoils back into the alley from whence he came and calls for backup. "What do we do?" Grayadder asks. "Wait for them to come full force," Kiefer says. "Just stay ready." Man, radio silence has already been broken. Maybe now would be a good time to put your heads down and wait for the cavalry.
7:34:56. Bitchelle approaches DoDder, takes care of some brief business we don't care about, and quickly gets to the real point of the scene. She apologizes for being "confrontational" earlier. DoDder understands, and says she thinks Bitchelle is making the right decisions, but thinks Bitchelle should "reevaluate [your] professional opinion of Soul Patch." When Bitchelle asks why, DoDder tells her that Soul Patch saved her and Kiefer's lives earlier. "I didn't know that," Bitchelle says softly. DoDder goes on to say that Soul Patch has issues, but he's good at what he does. "Fair enough," Bitchelle says. They both look over at him while he works, oblivious to their girl-talk. "And business aside," DoDder adds in a tone that makes me fairly sure she's going to comment on the contents of the Soul Pants, "he still cares about you." Well, that was a let-down. DoDder quits while she's ahead and walks off. Bitchelle decides to approach Soul Patch with a peace offering. "Just because I overruled you a few minutes ago doesn't mean I don't value your input," she says sincerely. Soul Patch scoffs at her not to patronize him. She assures him that she wants to hear whatever she has to say. He assures her, "I'm going to tell you what I think whether you want to hear it or not." Isn't that how they got split up in the first place?
Kiefer approaches the brothers in the store and asks if they're sure they want to do this. Mujibro PSAs that they're angrier about the attacks than anyone, "so we're going to stand with our fellow Americans in denouncing and resisting all forms of terrorism." Kiefer apologizes for this happening in their store. Mujibro explains that their father left them the store when he died, but that when he was alive, and a member of the Muslim American community, he stood with his fellow Americans in denouncing and resisting all forms of terrorism. Now, in his memory, his sons will do what he would have done, i.e. stand with their fellow Americans in denouncing and resisting all forms of terrorism. Kiefer is either getting choked up, or perhaps starting to gag, but he manages, "Just stay low and do what I tell you." He returns to Grayadder's side of the store. "Thank you for saving my life," Grayadder says. Kiefer doesn't point out that he (a) needed Grayadder alive to tell him where the printout was and (b) promised DoDder he'd take care of him. He just whispers -- wait for it -- "Yeah." That's our guy. Grayadder goes back to sighting along the barrel of his rifle. Kiefer's like, all this man-love is making me uncomfortable. Can't somebody shoot at me already? Right on cue, a commando creeps into view outside. That must be a relief for Kiefer. It's 7:39:02. Argh! That means more male bonding during the commercials!