Episode Report Card Niki: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mediation
By Niki | Season 1 | Episode 13 | Aired on 01.23.2000
Later in the day, Rick gets a call from Miles, who requests a meeting with him. Alone. The request is, characteristically, closer to a command, and Miles promptly hangs up after telling Rick to come by at four o'clock. Looking like a deer in headlights, Rick slowly sets down the receiver and then looks over his shoulder. I think it means he feels a little sneaky about going to see Miles without David.
Cut to Jake ranting in the mediator's office. It seems that Lily's turned his tactics back on his ass, and had an accountant show up unannounced at the restaurant. Of course, Jake can see no resemblance to his behavior toward Lily, since that would require pulling his head from his ass. Jake again insists that they can't afford to pay the accountant, but Lily shuts him up fast by saying she's paying for it. Ouch, that's hitting the big provider where it hurts, isn't it? Jake looks stricken for a moment before informing her that she's wasting her money. And the ugly truth finally starts to come out now that he's been backed into a corner. There's no money, he tells Lily. He actually looks like he's relishing this, like she asked for it because she finally found the chutzpah to take the issue into her own hands. He quickly runs down the values of the buildings, but they're canceled out by the mortgage and lien, essentially making them worthless. The restaurant is not theirs unless he finds some way to pay it off, which is why they have to sell the house.
Stunned, Lily demands to know what he's talking about. "Oh, grow up!" he responds. They have to sell the house to "save [his] stupid restaurant?" Lily asks. Jake towers over her, glowering and pointing, "It's our stupid restaurant" he shouts. Lily pours on the guilt on behalf of the kids, pointing out that the mess is one he created all by himself. He's not taking the blame alone, though, insisting that she approved of every step and signed her name to everything. "What choice did I have?" Lily snaps. Jake goes for the jugular, implying Lily's a spoiled little girl who's always relied on other people to take care of her. I get the impression that when things are working out, though, and Jake gets to sit in the hero's chair, he doesn't mind the financial dependence he's complaining about now. While he's ranting, Lily just keeps repeating she's "not going to sell the house" like it's a mantra. Seeing that she's stopped listening to him, "Ass-face," I mean "Jake," tries to mess with her head, telling her that she'll never make it without him taking care of her. When the two finally run out of steam, the mediator -- yes, she's been sitting here watching them the whole time -- tells them to take a moment to cool off while she goes pee yet again. I'm amazed Jake's not subtracting her many pee breaks from the cost of the sessions.