Episode Report Card Michael Neal: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Scrump That Screwed Christmas
By Michael Neal | Season 3 | Episode 6 | Aired on 12.11.2008
Lemon and Tracy wait in line at the post office until it's their turn with the clerk. Lemon wants to have a word with whoever screens the letters for the "Letters to Santa" program. "Maybe you can help me ... Trine." "Irene," corrects Irene who also informs her bluntly that the only letter screener was the box the letters were put into. Lemon asks to see their census information. "No." She would like to speak to the letter carrier ... "We close in 5 minutes" ... who services this postal area "Never going to happen." Lemon wants Tracy to help smooth out the confrontation. "Oh really? We're both black so we must know each other." Tracy looks over at Irene. "Hey! Irene!" He does know her.Lemon wants to know if Jack knows the Postmaster General. The answer is yes but they had a falling out after Jerry Garcia got his own stamp. "If I want to lick a hippie I'll just return Joan Baez's phone calls." Lemon notices that he has on the same clothes from yesterday. Jacks tells her that he can't go home. There was an incident last night. Colleen asked Jack to get a "heavy wool blanket" out from underneath her. He tugs at the blanket gently. "C'mon put your back into it," cajoles Colleen. Jack pulls at it like the end of a magic trick and Colleen gets deposited on the floor. One more broken hip later and Jack can't go home, for his and her safety. Plus she can't know about the eight minutes. "She'll have me arrested. She's done it before."
Kenneth asks Lemon how the baring of gifts went. She's contacted the Better Business Bureau about shutting down the Letters to Santa program. "What is wrong with you?" Kenneth wants to know. "You are being a real Scrooge." Lemon explains how it was all scam. There were no kids. There were no hugs. Tracy jumps on the sentence immediately. "Well if all you want is a hug from a Black person maybe you should just host the Price is Right." Did I mention that Tina Fey co-wrote this episode? It's quite noticeable how adroit she is when it comes to writing about race in her comedy. Usually they are the funniest moments on the show. The only other white comic figures that I can think of who do as well with that type of material are Larry David and Louis C.K., and that is one hell of a trifecta. Back to action: Kenneth tells Lemon she's wrong. She hasn't been scammed or even scrumped. "This is a religious holiday. When has religion ever caused any trouble?" Lemon calls him naive to which Kenneth say's she is acting like a real "c-word. That's right, cranky Sue." Lemon wants to prove him wrong. "It's dinner time. Tracy, Kenneth we're going uptown."