Episode Report Card Demian: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Zane's World
By Demian | Season 7 | Episode 14 | Aired on 02.12.2005
Somewhere else, Phoebe and Drake approach an office building we last saw on fire, and there's more of the Robin Hood banter and snore. Finally, the Doormat pulls up to the curb, and he and Pepper Anderson leap from the car with guns drawn. "Freeze!" Pepper Anderson shouts. Drake responds by casually whipping an arrow from his quiver and sending it flying in Pepper's direction. Heh. It wings her left shoulder, barely grazing her flesh, and she drops down behind the car as the wimpy Doormat dives for cover. Tool. Phoebe skitters over to see if Pepper's okay, and finds herself slapped into a pair of handcuffs for her trouble. Drake, meanwhile, takes advantage of this distraction to scamper into the office building.
Upstairs, he kicks in John Normand's door, only to have the thing bounce back and slam in his face. Again, inappropriately amusing shtick here. Drake quickly recovers and bursts through the door to announce, "We meet at last!" "What is this?" Normand demands. "The end of your reign," Drake glints, aiming another arrow at Normand's head before vanishing into the next commercial break. The soundtrack actually erupts with obnoxiously intrusive horns that blare, "Dun. Dun. DUN!," like, shut up, Obnoxiously Intrusive Horns. That's my fucking job. And was that really a DUN!-worthy moment? Hmmm? No. No, it wasn't. Not in the least, you pathetic excuse for a brass section. And so, what was a modestly entertaining episode the first time I saw it has begun to piss. Me. OFF.
Back from the break, Drake orders Normand to return all of the money he's stolen from the phone company's customers, and it's stupid, but at least the scene was short.
Out on the street, the still-cuffed Phoebe argues she can bring an end to all of this nonsense if Pepper Anderson would just give her the chance. Pepper's all, "Not in this lifetime, sweetie," but the Doormat pulls rank and orders his partner to let Phoebe go. The instant the cuffs are removed, Phoebe hustles across to enter the building. Once she's gone, Pepper Anderson distractedly muses, "You know, there's something oddly familiar about all this." The Doormat just grunts something about Pepper getting her wound dressed as he and the camera push past her, with the camera rising to track Phoebe as she disappears into the office building.
Back in the nonexistent attic, Piper and Raige kneel at a low table set with a circle of five candles as Raige reads the Roché-summoning spell she found at Not!warts.