Episode Report Card Deborah: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hole In Your Soul
By Deborah | Season 2 | Episode 2 | Aired on 09.30.2004
Cut to Luke "Kisses of Fire" Girardi making out with Grace "I Let The Music Speak" Polk. "Celebration" starts up again and she stops kissing him to say, "You put it on repeat in an attempt to circumvent our five-minute makeout rule." Luke: "Free will between the amorous parties supersedes contractual duty rendering our agreement void ab initio." Grace: "You're impaired, dude." She doesn't seem unhappy about it. Luke: "Caveat emptor. I have grounds to renegotiate." They go back to making out. They're all "Gracias Por La Musica."
Joan sits on the porch, calling out to no one in particular, "Adam, I'm sorry!" Glynis "Nina, Pretty Ballerina" Figliola comes out the front door, glued at the lips to some guy. Joan asks, "Glynis! Have you seen Adam?" Glynis unglues herself long enough to say, "Just Sean. We spent the summer doing cellular research at Stanford." She giggles and they go back to smooching giddily as they walk off.
Grace walks -- alone -- into the room we last saw Boozith in. She notices that Boozith "S.O.S" Montgomery is flat out on the floor, unconscious, with an empty bottle on her torso. Grace: "Judith? Judith!" No response. A couple making out on a chair splits. There are lots of people around; they couldn't be more indifferent. Grace tries to rouse Boozith but can't. Frink: "Please turn her on her side." As Grace is trying to wake her up, Friedman is there with his obligatory inappropriate comment: "Back off, Marge, she's mine." Grace asks, "Did she finish this whole bottle in an hour?" Friedman: "Is that even possible?" Grace: "Yeah, if you wanna die! Judith! Judith!" She tells Friedman to call 911. He stands there like a dolt. Grace: "Do it, freak!" Grace "You Owe Me One" Polk keeps trying to rouse Boozith.
On the porch, Joan's alarmed to see ambulances arriving. She calls out to Adam a couple of times, as Grace comes running to the porch: "She's in here!" Joan asks what's going on as the paramedics run in. Grace tells her, "Judith." They run inside.
Joan stands watching nervously as the paramedics take Boozith's vital signs. Cute Guy God meanders over. Joan asks hoarsely, "Why are you letting this happen? Do something!" He says, "'Keep your eyes open.' That's all I asked." Joan's outraged: "You're blaming me for this? No way are you blaming me!" He wanders off.
I watch some unbelievably annoying Gap commercial while Frink goes to the kitchen. I yell to him, "Do you not think Sarah Jessica Parker is the most incredibly horse-faced woman?" He agrees that he can't believe she's even considered pretty, never mind sexy.